General Fan Fiction posted October 21, 2008

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Sometimes breaking up can be tricky.

Breaking Up

by Readywriter52

Betty scowled at Dick, while he tried to maintain eye contact but couldn’t.
She planted her hands on her hips. “What do you have to say?”
“About what?”
She waved a letter in front of him. “About this letter.”
He grabbed for it, but she moved out of reach. “I’ll need it for my divorce.”
He straightened up. “What’re you talking about?”
“This is a letter from your girlfriend. She says she loves you and can’t understand why I won’t let you get a divorce.”
“I don’t have a girlfriend.”
“This strange woman certainly believes she’s your girlfriend. In fact, I believe that she’s your secretary.”
“She wrote it because I fired her.”
“She must be a vindictive woman.”
“Yes, she is. In fact, I had to let her go because she believed I loved her.”
“Oh! How did she get that idea?”
“I showed her a little kindness, and the first thing I knew she wanted to marry me. She got it into her mind that I wanted a divorce.”
“Oh, how horrible! She must be a loathsome woman. How could you have kept her as your secretary for so long?”
He reached over to pull her to him, but she moved out of reach. “Baby, you just don’t know how hard it was.”
“She used her position as secretary to lure you into her trap and sprung when you least suspected.”
He vigorously nodded his head. “You’re so understanding.”
“I bet she blackmailed you by threatening to expose your relationship with her if you didn’t divorce me.”
Again he reached for her, but she stepped away.
She sighed. “It must be so difficult to work with a woman like that.”
“Please dear, she didn’t mean a thing to me.”
“What do I mean to you?”
“I married you. You’re the light of my life. I can’t live without you. I’d do anything for you.”
“Oh, just how much are you willing to do for me?”
“Anything, just ask me.”
Betty tapped her foot and folded her arms across her chest. “I’m tired of living in this dumpy town. I want to tour the world by cruise ship.”
“Anything, we can’t afford it now, but in a few years who knows.”
Betty shook her head. “I want it now. You can afford it.”
Dick gave her a puzzled look. “Look dear, business is poor. In a few years, who knows?”
“You can afford it now!”
Dick vigorously shook his head. “Please you got to understand. I can’t afford a world cruise let alone a divorce.”
“You can afford a mistress but not a divorce. You’re in luck. I don’t want a divorce. I know you can’t afford a mistress and a divorce. So I’ll help you find a way to get the money.”
She looked to the door. “George, please come in.”
In walked a six foot six inch athletically built man. “Yes Sugarplum, what can I do to you?” He smiled broadly at his remark.
“Dick wants to know how he can get a world cruise for me. Why don’t you show him?”
At those words, George pulled out a Saturday night special from his jacket pocket and pointed it at Dick. “This is how we plan to get the money.”
Dick looked at them both with surprise. “You plan to rob me. I don’t have any money here.”
Betty laughed at his remarks. “You have a six million dollar insurance policy. The suicide clause expired two months ago. So now you’ll commit suicide, and I as your grieving widow will cheer myself up by taking a world cruise.”
He felt a gun being pressed into his hand and a cold barrel tight on his head. His last thoughts were damn; I’m glad I found out about that insurance policy and changed the beneficiary to my secretary.

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