General Non-Fiction posted January 3, 2025


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A funny sister story to show our differences

Alarming Behavior

by Lori Mulligan

You’d think the deafening BEEP BEEP! of the fire alarm would have woken me up, but instead, it was my sister, hovering over my bed with a full set of curlers in her hair and wrapped in a Christmas plaid bathrobe screaming, “Lori, let’s go! The fire alarm is going off!” 

“All right, all right, Jesus, Lee. I need a few minutes.”

“There’s no time. Move it!”

Between her voice and the sound of the fire alarm, I was glad I knew sign language as I thought I just might need it after this. “I’ll meet you outside. I need to get dressed.”

“I’m going out now!”

“You know it’s most likely a false alarm,” I called after her as she hastily shuffled out of my bedroom, but her fleece-lined slippers had already carried her out of earshot. “Whatever,” I mumbled.

I sat on the edge of my bed with no real sense of urgency, stretched my arms up high, and yawned really big. I grabbed a pair of jeans, pulled ‘em on, and threw on a sweatshirt and a pair of boots. It had snowed earlier that day. It was 2 a.m. on a Monday. This was not how I planned to start my jam-packed week. 

I bundled up in my winter coat, gloves, scarf and hat.

My phone lit up. Where the hell are you? I’m on the corner. Hurry up!

I exited the highrise, which was located on a very busy street in Silver Spring, MD, on the corner of East West Highway and 16th Street close to DC. 

I peered through the crowd and I didn't know what directed me to her first, the sounds of horns blowing as they drove past her or the fact she was the only crazy lady in curlers, a Griswald-inspired robe and soaked slippers standing at the busy intersection as far away from the building as possible. 

I hesitated for a moment. Do I really want to be seen with this looney tune? Then I thought as quirky as she is, she’s my sister, so I reluctantly joined her. 

“What the hell took you so long?”

I could barely hear her as the sounds of a fire engine approached and one truck entered the parking lot. “What do you know? A real fire.”

“Told you so,” she said smugly, reading my mind.

“Lee, I think if it were a five-alarm fire like you seem to think it is, they would’ve sent more than one engine. Give it 15 minutes and I bet they’re gone. At worst, someone probably burned some popcorn in the microwave.”

“Don’t be such a smart ass. And don’t be so sure of yourself.” 

Just as I was about to retort, two more fire engines rolled into the parking lot. I continued to ignore her smirks as we headed down to where the action was. 

Several of the firemen rushed inside the building but they didn’t bring hoses or any equipment. I was feeling encouraged again. 

Sure enough, 15 minutes later on the dot, they exited the building. Two of them walked past Lee and me and I asked, “What happened?”

“Malfunctioning fire alarm, nothing to worry about ladies.” 

They both stopped a moment to take in Lisa’s ensemble. “Well, we are not used to people taking fire alarms so seriously,” said the taller one with a grin, “but we’re glad to see you did!”!” We both had a little slice of humble pie for breakfast that morning. 





You may remember from previous posts, I'm dabbling in humor writing and welcome any feedback positive or constructive. I'm working on a collection of Sister Shorts and this will be one of the essays included. Thanks for taking the time to read. Lori
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