Humor Fiction posted February 6, 2024 |
We owe it to them
The Training of a Wife
by Deniz22
1. They are not like us...really.
2. They are not like them either; each is unique.
3. Some general differences between the sexes, often celebrated in song are obvious, and certainly worth singing about.
4. However, over time, more subtle differences between us manifest themselves and require their re-training.
5. After 60+ of marriage, I realized the brutal fact, my wife did not respect me and I set out to help her achieve this highly valued goal.
6. I started slowly and patiently to help her, driven by many past experiences of disrespect on her part.
7. I noticed one day she was emptying the dishwasher and grumbling about it. Seems she found the frequent loading and unloading a tedious task.
8. I saw my chance to begin the reboot! The next time the dishwasher dinged it's completion cycle signal and she wasn't around to hear it, I GOT UP AND EMPTIED THE DISHWASHER! That's right, the WHOLE dishwasher!
9. She turned a corner that night! I saw a tiny little spark of respect in her eyes after I pointed out my deed a couple of times, not for my glory but to help in her retraining. A trained wife is a happy wife!
10. We're about 3/4 through her retraing and it's going wonderfully! I've been making the bed, taking out the trash, feeding the birds (even on the cold days), making sure her car is gassed up and serviced regularly, and today I remembered to put the toilet paper on the roller the right way! She even said, "Good boy!" without prompting!
Men, we can do this and we MUST do it for them!
1. They are not like us...really.
2. They are not like them either; each is unique.
3. Some general differences between the sexes, often celebrated in song are obvious, and certainly worth singing about.
4. However, over time, more subtle differences between us manifest themselves and require their re-training.
5. After 60+ of marriage, I realized the brutal fact, my wife did not respect me and I set out to help her achieve this highly valued goal.
6. I started slowly and patiently to help her, driven by many past experiences of disrespect on her part.
7. I noticed one day she was emptying the dishwasher and grumbling about it. Seems she found the frequent loading and unloading a tedious task.
8. I saw my chance to begin the reboot! The next time the dishwasher dinged it's completion cycle signal and she wasn't around to hear it, I GOT UP AND EMPTIED THE DISHWASHER! That's right, the WHOLE dishwasher!
9. She turned a corner that night! I saw a tiny little spark of respect in her eyes after I pointed out my deed a couple of times, not for my glory but to help in her retraining. A trained wife is a happy wife!
10. We're about 3/4 through her retraing and it's going wonderfully! I've been making the bed, taking out the trash, feeding the birds (even on the cold days), making sure her car is gassed up and serviced regularly, and today I remembered to put the toilet paper on the roller the right way! She even said, "Good boy!" without prompting!
Men, we can do this and we MUST do it for them!
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