| Humor Flash Fiction posted January 30, 2021 |
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Tail-gate FLASHer Strikes Out
Parking-Lot Picnic: Three Takes
by Elizabeth Emerald
The author has placed a warning on this post for language.
The author has placed a warning on this post for sexual content.
In case you didn't notice the minuscule warning flags: be forewarned that this ditty is dirty indeed.
TAKE ONE:
A flasher in trenchcoat disguise
knowing Sue wouldn't surmise
approached as she parked
pulled up close in the dark
Then whipped out a six-inch surprise
TAKE TWO:
He invited Maria to lunch
al fresco, she hadn't a hunch
that the barbecue fare
was raw more than rare
She hauled off and gave him a punch
TAKE THREE:
He promised Jane burgers and corn
The menu was hot dogs and porn
He attempted to feed her
his half-foot-long wiener
She told him to blow his own horn
* * * * * *
Thus ends the tail-getter's tale
His three "dates" had him hauled off to jail
for indecent assault
His dick was at fault
Thus his dick has been held without bail
* * * * * *
In case you are wondering why this is classified as FLASH:
1) I couldn't resist the pun.
2) To classify this filth as "poetry" would be gross sacrilege.
Sad to say, these takes were inspired by the experiences of an unfortunate friend.
In case you didn't notice the minuscule warning flags: be forewarned that this ditty is dirty indeed.
TAKE ONE:
A flasher in trenchcoat disguise
knowing Sue wouldn't surmise
approached as she parked
pulled up close in the dark
Then whipped out a six-inch surprise
TAKE TWO:
He invited Maria to lunch
al fresco, she hadn't a hunch
that the barbecue fare
was raw more than rare
She hauled off and gave him a punch
TAKE THREE:
He promised Jane burgers and corn
The menu was hot dogs and porn
He attempted to feed her
his half-foot-long wiener
She told him to blow his own horn
* * * * * *
Thus ends the tail-getter's tale
His three "dates" had him hauled off to jail
for indecent assault
His dick was at fault
Thus his dick has been held without bail
* * * * * *
In case you are wondering why this is classified as FLASH:
1) I couldn't resist the pun.
2) To classify this filth as "poetry" would be gross sacrilege.
Sad to say, these takes were inspired by the experiences of an unfortunate friend.
TAKE ONE:
A flasher in trenchcoat disguise
knowing Sue wouldn't surmise
approached as she parked
pulled up close in the dark
Then whipped out a six-inch surprise
TAKE TWO:
He invited Maria to lunch
al fresco, she hadn't a hunch
that the barbecue fare
was raw more than rare
She hauled off and gave him a punch
TAKE THREE:
He promised Jane burgers and corn
The menu was hot dogs and porn
He attempted to feed her
his half-foot-long wiener
She told him to blow his own horn
* * * * * *
Thus ends the tail-getter's tale
His three "dates" had him hauled off to jail
for indecent assault
His dick was at fault
Thus his dick has been held without bail
* * * * * *
In case you are wondering why this is classified as FLASH:
1) I couldn't resist the pun.
2) To classify this filth as "poetry" would be gross sacrilege.
Sad to say, these takes were inspired by the experiences of an unfortunate friend.
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