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"Way Out There"


Chapter 1
Bald and Bushy

By BeasPeas

Author Note:'Way Out There' ~ #1-396-B-C


Mars spies Venus across the cafe
His gaze from her face doesn't stray
But when he winks she turns away
Mars ramps up his bold persistence
Ego inflates, denies resistance
Glad Venus knows of his existence


Venus considers how it is
When hair follicles lose their fizz
Out sprouts bushy eyebrow frizz
Venus marvels as she looks at him
And wonders why as hair grows thin
Men instead grow it on their chin


Mars puffs out his chest, feeling great
Runs his hand over his shiny pate
Hormones increasing his heart rate
Mars, with belly sucked in and taut,
Anticipates what Cupid brought
'Bald men have it going on,'  he thought


Venus flees as Mars heads to her table
Noting his gait is none too stable
Tipsy on Ambrosia's Black Label
Venus likes bald men in their prime
But bushy beards and brows are a crime
If Mars will shave he will be sublime

Marilyn D.F. Boire ~ January 22, 2015
'Way Out There'

 

Author Notes Image: beardgod
Humor


Chapter 2
Green

By BeasPeas

Author Note:'Way Out There' ~ #2-396-B-C


Green!
Most shades
I have seen,
unless muted,
are barfy colors.
This one mean green machine
blends perfectly in nature,
but when worn up against the face
usually isn't flattering.
Makes one look like a sickly alien!


Marilyn D.F. Boire ~ July 24, 2015
'Way Out There'

 

Author Notes Etheree poetry contest: Syllables: 1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10.
I REALLY do like the color green--not as much as blue, though.
Image: Alien, Roswell, NM UFO Museum.


Chapter 3
Beach Ball Buns

By BeasPeas

Author Note:'Way Out There' ~ #3-396-B

Before my eyes, I see a sight to hypnotize
Brings a smile in the cookie aisle to mesmerize

Right then and there this poem pops into my head,
to rhyme and post with dread... risk dings for what I said

But here goes:

Curvy girls have what some guys like, round beach ball buns
More to jiggle and sometimes pinch than scrawny ones

Big beach ball buns burst blue jean seams that strangulize,
these naked nymphs reveal their blooms and butterflies


Marilyn D.F. Boire ~ July 9, 2016
'Way Out There'

 

Author Notes In the supermarket the other day, I saw a woman in jeans whose posterior prompted this poem. Couldn't take my eyes off her bottom as she jiggled on down the cookie aisle. What was I doing there? Buying cookies, of course! This is just a humorous observation and nothing more.
Syllables: 12. Minimal punctuation intentional. Thank you for reading my poetry.

Image: Mixed media by Boire


Chapter 4
Captain Kirk And His Women

By BeasPeas

Author Note:'Way Out There' ~ #4-396-B-C


Captain Jim Kirk receives instructions from Starfleet Command.
He's miffed because his new orders read like a reprimand.
     Message: 
Keep your shirt on, don't get romantic or naughty.
       Beam down. Take Mr. Spock. Be sure to leave behind Scottie.


With Uhura at the screen, the ship steady as she goes,
Scottie beams down Kirk and Spock on a mission no one knows.

     Mr. Spock's orders: 
Restrain Kirk with logical wisdom,
       liberating the captain's libido from strange women.
       Jim Kirk follows his heart with alien ladies who tempt,
       tending to lose focus on mission's purpose, which pre-empts.
       Females flirt with the captain so, Mr. Spock, watch over,
       assuring Jim sticks to business and eyes don't rover.


So just like a sailor of old, captain dallies in port,
prey to creatures with odd DNA with whom he cavorts.
Though Kirk yearns for the dancer who eats veggies and turns green,
captain, instead, falls into bed to linger with the queen.
Can the universe be saved when he tastes her lips' sweet kiss?
Can Enterprise wait, hover in space, while Jim's lost in his bliss?
     
     Mr. Scott's orders: 
Beam up captain from love's vile clutch, your chore,
       so crew can explore galaxies where none dared go before.


Marilyn D.F. Boire - September 6, 2016
'Way Out There'

 

Author Notes The original series Star Trek began on September 8, 1966 celebrating its 50th anniversary.
Image: Thank you bing/womenatwarp


Chapter 5
Blip!

By BeasPeas

Author Note:'Way Out There' ~ #5-396-B


Blip!
Scotty's hip!
Defective microchip.
Causing engines worn out gears to strip.
Not possible to be fixed with some paper clips.
Spock's advice to Kirk!  "Abandon ship."
Enterprise radar flips.
Where's airstrip?
Blip!

Blip!
Rocky trip!
Gorn licks Captain; smacks lips.
Kirk fights alien Gorn whose tongue flicks.
Hoping for breakfast, slippery saliva drips
Mister Spock saves the day, tazer zips.
Large lizard loosens grip.
Gorn's gone, whipped!
Blip!


Marilyn D.F. Boire ~ November 29, 2016
'Way Out There'
'

 

Author Notes This is a "Pat's spaceship poem" patterned on Patricia's (patcelaw) form she invented. Syllables are: 1-3-6-9-12-9-6-3-1. When centered, the lines take the form of a spaceship--so I wrote my poem about space. Thank you for reading my poetry and thank you, Patricia.

Image: bing/kirk wrestling gorn


Chapter 6
A Limerick for Marvin

By BeasPeas

Author Note:'Way Out There' ~ #6-396-B


Here is a limerick for Marvin
whose poetry won't leave him starvin'
He has wit by the score
I couldn't ask for more
Keeps me rollin' on the floor laughin'


Marilyn D.F. Boire ~ December 27, 2016
'Way Out There Poems'

Author Notes My limerick for Marv (see Marvin Calloway here on FanStory) in answer to his limerick for me (although I don't own a fur coat). All the fur in my life contains live cats and dogs.

Syllables: 9-9-6-6-9 (By syllable counter the word limerick has 3.)
Image: public domain emoticons


Chapter 7
Bending The Fabric of Time

By BeasPeas

Author Note:'Way Out There' ~ #7-396-B-C


Do I live in the now,
she mused ~

or only within my mind?
Can I conjure up the Big Bang,
bending the fabric of time?

Infrared heat holds the phantom
of where I once placed my feet,
and in slow motion, I see
where I've walked along the street.

She continued ~
If I consider for a moment,
when sharing a lover's kiss,
how quickly clock's hands tick;
compare then,
she challenged ~
how slowly hours pass
when I'm not with the one that I miss.

I don't think we are real,
she said ~
and after she explained it all to me,
I agreed.
Time stretches and folds,
twisting and turning to fool us.
We only just live in our head.


Marilyn D.F. Boire ~ December 27, 2016
"Way Out There'




 

Author Notes Image: NASA


Chapter 8
Sweet Sumo ~ Geico Star

By BeasPeas

Author Note:'Way Out There' ~ #8-396-B

Some think your routine is out of place,
but I love to watch your gliding grace
across the pristine ice so smooth,
and I applaud your every move.

Sweet Sumo face aglow with faith,
you put to shame those skinny wraiths,
completing a perfect Corkscrew spin,
then cradling the Baby Bird to win.

Sumo wrestler, new Geico star,
costumed in loin cloth as you are,
you prove that heft, by far is grander,
than Geico's green salamander.

Marilyn D.F. Boire ~ December 28, 2016
'Way Out There'

 

Author Notes This Sumo wrestler (his name is Byamba) is the star of the new Geico Insurance commercial by Martin Agency. (Geico is the company represented by the green salamander with the Australian accent.) If you haven't seen the commercial with the wrestler, treat yourself to this charming ad. It's my favorite. Thank you for reading my poetry.

Corkscrew spin and Baby Bird ~ competitive routines in ice skating
skinny wraiths ~ most skaters are thin and agile
heft ~ Sumo is a big guy

Image: Courtesy of bing/martinagency.com


Chapter 9
Stashed Cash

By BeasPeas

Author Note:'Way Out There' ~ #9-396-B-C


It's time to begin living my fantasy,
to fire up the Jag, step on the gas and drive.
I'll disappear; I'll seek to follow destiny.

This is the end to my humdrum existence,
thanks to the fortune embezzled and stashed cash.
My larceny's the product of persistence.

Now I can party all night without rival,
float the seas on yachts with barons, counts and earls,
play at love and sip champagne for survival.


Marilyn D.F. Boire ~ February 1, 2017
'Way Out There'


 

Author Notes Use words: fantasy, gas, rival, float. Second place winner.
Thank you for reading my poetry.

Image: bing/rarewallpapers


Chapter 10
Avocado Addiction of The Greenies

By BeasPeas

Author Note:'Way Out There' ~ #10-396-B


"If flying saucers are real," Earthlings have always asked, "why don't they land on the White House lawn?  The answer?  They don't want to.

Extraterrestrials have been dropping in on our planet for millennia.  So what's their agenda?

Recent 'think tank' studies suggest it's their fondness for Earth's avocados.  According to a study just completed by Dr. I. Noah Tall and his team, Spacelings discovered avocados growing in the green gold groves of southern California eons ago.

The prevailing theory is that the aliens' penchant for this fruit has, over time, rendered them asexual mutants.  The reproductive process of this species is still a mystery and the subject of ongoing debate.

In addition, it's believed that Spacelings may suffer from avocado addiction which has become toxic.  Toxicity has afforded excellent night vision through huge avocado-shaped eyes, but has permanently tinged their skin viridian.  Consequently, scientists have affectionately dubbed them 'Greenies.'  It's anticipated that analysis of DNA found at the scene of several stripped groves will provide some answers or at least lead to a logical conclusion.

On very dark nights, using binoculars, field researchers have observed space beings shinnying like monkeys to the top of trees.  There, they gorge themselves on the choicest, tastiest avocados until sated.  Recovery from avocadic stupor may require two to three hours.

Shortly before dawn the 'Greenies' strip the groves of all remaining fruit.  The highly prized avocados are then readied for transport to distant galaxies. 

 

Disc
silently
enters Earth's atmosphere,
losing itself in cloud swirls below.
Stealth flying saucer lands in avocado groves.
Huge eyes provide superb night vision;
aliens strip trees bare,
abduct fruit.
Gone!

Abducted avocados are then sold on the open market, but not before suffering the indignity of pinching and poking to determine their suppleness.

Sadly, once purchased, hapless victims are indecently displayed, comingled with spicy salsa.  Their captors and guests enjoy guacamole rituals like this, not dissimilar to Earth's Super Bowl Sunday and Cinco de Mayo celebrations, amid laughing, shouting, and overindulgent revelry.

 
Home!
Disc arrives
laden with stolen fruit.
Off to market avocados go.
Pinched, prodded, bought, mashed and spiced, revelry begins
amid taunting, laughing, strangers' shouts
till every morsel's gone.
Game's over.
Lost!

For the interested reader, the complete article, "Avocado Addiction of The Greenies," by Dr. I. Noah Tall, can be found in the scholarly publication, Journal Intergalaxia.

Marilyn D.F. Boire ~ February 12, 2017
'Way Out There'





 

Author Notes green gold - slang for avocados
viridian - green
Thank you to our patcelaw (Patricia Lawrence) for creating the Spaceship poetry form (syllables: 1-3-6-9-12-9-6-3-1) which is perfect when writing my posts for 'Way Out There' chapters. Thank you for reading my work.

Image: Bing


Chapter 11
The Watchers

By BeasPeas

Author Note:'Way Out There' ~ #11-396-B-C


The Watchers loiter
at vision's periphery,
perceived but unseen.
Amorphous phantoms' mischief
tests limit of sanity.


Marilyn D.F. Boire ~ March 4, 2017
'Way Out There'

 

Author Notes Do you see amorphous beings out of the corner of your eye? You turn; nothing is there.

Image: Marilyn D.F. Boire, colored pencil.


Chapter 12
R & R in New York

By BeasPeas

Author Note:'Way Out There' ~ #12-396-B-C


Suppose the Enterprise came back from two-two-seven-oh
and landed in Central Park of today's New York City,
would we or wouldn't we consider it a UFO?

~*~
"Spock"

Captain talks.
"Get your shots in sick bay.
Time for some R & R in New York."

Raucous cheers erupt from the crew of Enterprise.
"Raise your antenna, Manhattan rocks.
Don't delay, it's payday."

Spaceship docks.
Shocks.


Marilyn D.F. Boire ~ July 12, 2017
'Way Out There'



 

Author Notes Total poem contains 12 lines. The tercet contains 14 syllables per line.

I added the tercet because some reviewers are of the opinion that the Enterprise would not be considered a UFO. I guess this opinion may be based on one of two things:
1. The Enterprise originated on Earth in 2270, (although nearly 300 years into the future). Therefore not an alien vessel.
2. We are familiar with the Startrek series, so it's yesterday's news.

But consider that if in the year 2270 (nearly 300 years into the future) the Enterprise returned to 2017 wouldn't we call the sighting a UFO? Startrek often dealt with time travel, going forward and backward.

The 9-line spaceship form poem was originated by Patricia Lawrence (patcelaw) of FanStory. Syllables: 1-3-6-9-12-9-6-3-1. Option to rhyme or not. Thank you Patricia for the use of your form.

Image: Startrek.com


Chapter 13
Sans Undies

By BeasPeas

Author Note:'Way Out There' ~ #13-396-B

Sometimes it's grand and, oh, so freeing
to be sans undies for comfort's being.
No longer trussed tight with stays that bind
nor cinched of breath by fashion's design.
To be sans undies frees unseen places
for air to swirl in open spaces.

~*~


Marilyn D.F. Boire ~ July 23, 2017
'Way Out There'

 

 

Author Notes sans ~ French for without
Wearing tight corsets shifted women's internal organs from their normal placement to wherever the body could adjust to accommodate them.
Image: Public domain/copyright free
Thank you for reading my poetry.


Chapter 14
Down In The Bog

By BeasPeas

Author Note:'Way Out There' ~ #14-396-B


I'm just a frog,
a bump on a log,
who lives in a fog,
down in the bog
with Polly Wog.

To get my kicks,
tongue sticky flicks,
smashing to bits
in froggy blitz
those tiny nits 
that buzz and flit.

I'll tell no lies,
fat filthy flies,
that I despise,
meet their demise
in swift surprise.

But I'm too fat,
too long I sat.
My coat won't fit,
the seams are split.
I'll don my hat,
thanks for the chat.


Marilyn D.F. Boire ~ August 12, 2017
'Way Out There'

 

Author Notes This is a nonsense poem for a bit of fun. Thank you for reading
Image: public domain/copyright free


Chapter 15
Ye Old Sink Sponge

By BeasPeas

Author Note:'Way Out There' ~ #15-396-B-C

I wonder what it would be like,
living life as ye old sink sponge,
soaking up slop with every swipe,
clearing away grease, grime and grunge.

Woe's the fate of kitchen sponges
when no longer young and purty.
After cleaning up messes of munchers,
they're tossed in the trash when dirty.


Marilyn D.F. Boire ~ August 28, 2017
'Way Out There'

 

Author Notes Image: Clip art.


Chapter 16
Stuffed Up

By BeasPeas

Author Note:'Way Out There' ~ #16-396-B-C


Due to stuffed up node,
I cannot recite an ode
praising how it snowed.

~*~


Marilyn D.F. Boire ~  December 15, 2017
'Way Out There'


 

Author Notes Thank you Shutterstock


Chapter 17
Mosquitoes

By BeasPeas

Author Note:'Way Out There' ~ #17-396-B-C


Beyond the screen door,
mosquitoes
hone their beaks and wait.

~*~


Marilyn D.F. Boire ~ July 6, 2018
'Way Out There'

 

Author Notes We've had a lot of rain, mosquitoes won't quit. Thank you for reading.


Chapter 18
Satellite Number Four

By BeasPeas

Author Note:'Way Out There' ~ #18-396-B-C


Somehow I've lost a satellite phone;
it's one of four, whereabouts unknown.
 
Empty base sits bare upon the shelf,
phone's roaming alone, all by itself.
 
Three siblings remain, four's just a clone,
although each ringtone's its very own.
 
Wishing to hear absent ring once more,
I'll keep on searching for number four.

~*~

 

Author Notes Yes, I lost one of my satellite phones, presumably here in the house. Looked everywhere to find it.

Note: I'm not making light of missing persons on milk cartons. That's a good way to get the message out there.

Image: Thank you bing.


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