Paradise Lost
5-7-5 Contest Entry13 total reviews
Comment from Bill Schott
This 5-7-5 about a bird, Paradise Lost, has the correct set up and mixes the ideal with the surreal as the title depicts the reality of global effects on these unique creatures.
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This 5-7-5 about a bird, Paradise Lost, has the correct set up and mixes the ideal with the surreal as the title depicts the reality of global effects on these unique creatures.
Comment Written 17-Mar-2018
Comment from donette1914
very cool photo of the trees underwater and a very good poem and well penned. i enjoy it very much and very creative it was a pleasure
comment made by donette1914 on the date of march 16th 2016
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very cool photo of the trees underwater and a very good poem and well penned. i enjoy it very much and very creative it was a pleasure
comment made by donette1914 on the date of march 16th 2016
Comment Written 16-Mar-2018
Comment from Nika2016
You deserve a six for the beautiful art work
and words...Tthere is something haunting
about this one.
It seems to sing a
sad melody.
How do we lengthen the text for a 2-3 line poem? I usually relate it to a personal experience, but have not lived in a rainforest...:)
reply by the author on 16-Mar-2018
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You deserve a six for the beautiful art work
and words...Tthere is something haunting
about this one.
It seems to sing a
sad melody.
How do we lengthen the text for a 2-3 line poem? I usually relate it to a personal experience, but have not lived in a rainforest...:)
Comment Written 15-Mar-2018
reply by the author on 16-Mar-2018
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Hi, Nika
Nice to see you. I'm not around much lately. I'm delighted you enjoyed this one. It is sad and foreboding. I hope it gives people pause. It's always the most difficult thing for me to STOP within the framework of these short pieces. Maybe I'll use this as the beginning for something longer. A good idea ... or, you may if you wish. :)) mike
Comment from Mary Hollingsworth
Captivating creature and a such a shame that their trees of choice are overwhelmed with water. I can't help but wonder where will they nest now. writer I've never seen a bird so mystical and yet so beautiful at the same time. Thanks for sharing. It was an educational moment for me.
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Captivating creature and a such a shame that their trees of choice are overwhelmed with water. I can't help but wonder where will they nest now. writer I've never seen a bird so mystical and yet so beautiful at the same time. Thanks for sharing. It was an educational moment for me.
Comment Written 15-Mar-2018
Comment from Mrs. KT
Hello!
What a powerful message to be found in your 5/7/5 poetic offering. Climate change, man's need for progress, man's need to kill for the sake of procuring trophies = paradise lost for certain. A timely message and one that is very well-crafted.
Thank you for sharing!
diane
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Hello!
What a powerful message to be found in your 5/7/5 poetic offering. Climate change, man's need for progress, man's need to kill for the sake of procuring trophies = paradise lost for certain. A timely message and one that is very well-crafted.
Thank you for sharing!
diane
Comment Written 14-Mar-2018
Comment from Gloria ....
Author this is so sad. I had no idea the trees were so deeply underwater now. Of course it's going to affect the Birds of Paradise. They're all going to drown. :(
Pity so many people don't believe climate change is real. It's just heartbreaking really.
Best wishes to you in the contest.
Gloria
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2018
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Author this is so sad. I had no idea the trees were so deeply underwater now. Of course it's going to affect the Birds of Paradise. They're all going to drown. :(
Pity so many people don't believe climate change is real. It's just heartbreaking really.
Best wishes to you in the contest.
Gloria
Comment Written 14-Mar-2018
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2018
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The ecosystems of the Earth are more delicate than most people realize. They're easily damaged without introducing a rising ocean into the mix. I was going to add a GIF of the Bird of Paradise, but it honestly didn't look real. An amazing looking creature with a cool mating dance, puts me to shame. LOL
Thanks for a thoughtful and encouraging review. I'll cross my fingers for the contest, people don't always like gloom and doom. :)) Anon
Comment from Pamusart
I wanted to let you know ASAP that I can't read your post. I am not sure about others. I would advise you to go to your portfolio and click on the name of your poem. You will then see it the way we do. Good luck in the contest with whatever you said.
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2018
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I wanted to let you know ASAP that I can't read your post. I am not sure about others. I would advise you to go to your portfolio and click on the name of your poem. You will then see it the way we do. Good luck in the contest with whatever you said.
Comment Written 14-Mar-2018
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2018
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Hmm. I see it on my phone and laptop. Are you in Classic maybe? Well, it's an embedded piece, the words are overlayed onto the artwork. Once in a while when I do this I DO get someone who can't read it. I'm sorry that's the case with you. Here are the words. The picture is of some trees that are under water due to rising water levels. Again, sorry about the presentation. Thanks for pointing it out and being so generous with your rating. MUCH appreciated. :)) Anon
Paradise Lost
Birds of Paradise
bemoan their ironic name
trees under water
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Thank you. I appreciate you giving me the words
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Your so welcome. Thank YOU for giving me the benefit of the doubt. Many just mark folks down when they can't read. You're most kind. :))
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Same thing happened to me. First person told me but did mark me down to 4. I was still so grateful to her for letting me know.
Comment from Alexander Vasa
Great contest entry. Best of luck. Your poem is published beautifully and I noticed no errors. I think you have created a lovely image with your few carefully chosen words, thanks, Ana.
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Great contest entry. Best of luck. Your poem is published beautifully and I noticed no errors. I think you have created a lovely image with your few carefully chosen words, thanks, Ana.
Comment Written 14-Mar-2018
Comment from rspoet
This is an excellent 5-7-5 poem of the Birds of Paradise
and entry for the contest
They certainly are incredible birds
and the environmental changes will have
effects on them and many other birds and animals
Excellent message in your poem
Well done
Good luck in the contest
RS
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This is an excellent 5-7-5 poem of the Birds of Paradise
and entry for the contest
They certainly are incredible birds
and the environmental changes will have
effects on them and many other birds and animals
Excellent message in your poem
Well done
Good luck in the contest
RS
Comment Written 13-Mar-2018
Comment from karenina
The juxtaposition of n a ME and reality is brought home with a few finely hones words....the climate has become , literally, a natural a l enemy.....God help them!
Karenina
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The juxtaposition of n a ME and reality is brought home with a few finely hones words....the climate has become , literally, a natural a l enemy.....God help them!
Karenina
Comment Written 13-Mar-2018
