Reviews from

The West

Viewing comments for Chapter 2 "The West"
One man's journey west.

27 total reviews 
Comment from davisr (Rhonda)
Excellent
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I like the way you educate us on wagon trains, and about the Oregon Trail. We've all heard about it, but not in detail. You made it interesting, and worked it into your story about Sarah and her family heading west.

Sounds a bit scary with your description of the way life would be like along the trail. Hmmm, rather dirty. I guess people made sacrifices, though.

Again, great story,
Rhonda

 Comment Written 07-Jan-2018


reply by the author on 07-Jan-2018
    It was not an easy journey.
Comment from Tier V. King
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Hello there, Thomas: This feels like a new introduction into the story. I must have skipped iver this somehow because I was already at the point where Sarah and her new friend decided to be together. Anyway, this is a good part also, very detailed and well writte. I'll back track to see if I missed anything.

 Comment Written 07-Jan-2018


reply by the author on 07-Jan-2018
    You're reading out of order. Robyn Corum Always reads that way.
reply by Tier V. King on 07-Jan-2018
    Okay I will have to go back then.
Comment from Pearl Edwards
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Good descriptions from the wagon master of what they will have to endure on the trip ahead and also of the sounds of the wagon wheels and the crickets. You really put that noise into the readers head.
Enjoyed the opening two chapters Thomas.
cheers

 Comment Written 07-Jan-2018


reply by the author on 07-Jan-2018
    I can still hear them squeaking.
Comment from write hand blue
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Good descriptions that put you at the scene of the story. The reader can easily imagine the hardships of the wagon train trailing all the way to Oregon.

Great atmosphere as we learn about the squeaking wheels. Sounds as if they need a liberal greasing with lard. LOL.

I think I will read more of this tale.

~Mel~


 Comment Written 05-Jan-2018


reply by the author on 05-Jan-2018
    I hope you stay with it. Things are about to heat up.
Comment from robyn corum
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Thomas,

Welll....it's started. You're really doing it. You'ere actually going to begin torturing these good people to no end for a very long time. You should be ashamed of yourself. But somehow, I have a feeling you're probably feeling something different - like pride, or something odd like that. Oh...my. You odd duck.


 Comment Written 04-Jan-2018


reply by the author on 04-Jan-2018
    That's right. Sit back and take it. You know you want it. Are we still talking about the novel?
Comment from kiwigirl2821
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Sarah is so impatient but what a great character! She needs the stable hand of her father. I don't think any of them have a real concept of the journey or how long it will actually take. Super writing Thomas. xx deborah

 Comment Written 04-Jan-2018


reply by the author on 04-Jan-2018
    Thanks. You're right. It's going to require more than they know.
Comment from Alcreator Litt Dear
Excellent
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A great cultural fiction read, it's rich ingredients, the beginning is catchy, there is a good flow of thoughts with steady plot development, realistic dialogues and vociferous taletelling, good referral, wishful ending. DR ALCREATOR

 Comment Written 04-Jan-2018


reply by the author on 04-Jan-2018
    Thanks for the comments.
Comment from rtobaygo
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Good morning, Thomas

Excellent continuation. Enjoyed the read. Out of sixes. The research was spot on.
Liked the analogy regarding the salamander, toad muskrat and jackass. I never realized that some trains never saw native Americans --- I would thought just the opposite.

Take care and stay safe,

Ray

 Comment Written 04-Jan-2018


reply by the author on 04-Jan-2018
    Maybe they will be lucky, but Sarah wants to see the Indians for herself.
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
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Ten miles a day, Thomas. Woo Hoo! I could be in the next town west of me in 2 days or in the next one east of me in 1 day.

I like your use of descriptions with the wagon wheels, the crickets, & Herb Jenkins. I guess he was the 'squeaky wheel that got the grease, right"

Good job & thanks for sharing. Jan

 Comment Written 03-Jan-2018


reply by the author on 03-Jan-2018
    Thanks for reading and taking the time to comment.
Comment from Brigitte Elko
Excellent
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Reading this was a guided ride and an informative pilot to wagon train travel. It was enjoyable to read and the characters plausible. This reader is anxious to find out what the " Perils of Sarah" will be. Thank you for sharing, not a flaw to be found in the writing.
Blessings,
Brigitte

 Comment Written 03-Jan-2018


reply by the author on 03-Jan-2018
    Sarah's trials are coming. Thanks for reading.
reply by Brigitte Elko on 04-Jan-2018
    My pleasure.
    Brigitte