Reviews from

Beauty for Ash and Stone

Viewing comments for Chapter 2 "Speak Out - Day 2"
Devotions for Survivors of Sexual Abuse

24 total reviews 
Comment from l.raven
Excellent
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Hi Melissa, I wish my sister would have talked to someone...but she waited 30 years...and her life was so messed up...a great message in this chapter my sweet friend...very well spoken...very well written...and your picture shows the loneliness...love you...Linda xxoo

 Comment Written 25-Dec-2017


reply by the author on 25-Dec-2017
    Hi Linda, it took me a very long time too, but counseling and healing was the best gift I've ever given myself! Somehow God uses the mess. Thank you for sharing about your sister! Mel
reply by l.raven on 25-Dec-2017
    it took her a long time to get help...but she had to face it herself...we could help...but not take the nightmare away...always sooooo welcome...xxoo love
reply by the author on 25-Dec-2017
    It does for most people. Some never seek help:(
Comment from davisr (Rhonda)
Excellent
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Again, I can't praise this book enough. As a high school teacher, I have had many students approach me about sexual abuse. When I taught Jr. High, I had even more. It is so important that they speak out. It does help break the cycle.

Thank you, again, for sharing and caring,
Rhonda

 Comment Written 18-Dec-2017


reply by the author on 18-Dec-2017
    Hi Rhonda, I'm so glad students came to you. I wish I would have had a teacher I trusted enough to tell. I think it really was my feeling of responsibility to hold my family together as the real reason I didn't tell. Thanks for reading! I appreciate it:) Mel
reply by davisr (Rhonda) on 18-Dec-2017
    Yeah, that's the problem I had with the abuse I was going through. I had been the product of divorce, and I knew how bad it had been on my family.

    I was also afraid of going to hell. I won't lie. I had preachers tell me that would happen if I didn't stay and make it work. In the end, CPS threatened to take my kids if I didn't get me and them out of it. I listened then.
Comment from flylikeaneagle
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Mel: stars for you *** we need to be voices and speak out.
Our daughters and friends need to know that they can come to us.
We have to listen and find help. Great awareness of situations.
Many people don't listen. On the news, women are speaking up.
flylikeaneagle - nancy

 Comment Written 10-Dec-2017


reply by the author on 10-Dec-2017
    Hi Nancy, it is time to heal those who are silent and stay in bondage. Thank you for the wonderful review and six stars! I appreciate you:) Mel
reply by flylikeaneagle on 10-Dec-2017
    Mel: I am glad women are speaking out and people are resigning from office. Great writing, Mel.
    nancy
reply by the author on 10-Dec-2017
    Yes, it seems to be coming unglued in Hollywood and in politics. I wish I could say it surprises me, but it doesn't. Corey Feldman exposed the pedophilia in Hollywood years ago, but no one believed him. Now, he's making a movie about it.
Comment from Tier V. King
Excellent
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Good morning, Mel: I read this part the other day and I thought that i commented already. I do have some ideas to suggest for this book of your but I will PM you about them. It's great so far to see how you are dealing with each issue so thoroughly. You have a very caring and loving heart. This is a good thing that you are doing and so necessary. There are those who are afraid to speak out and will not so we would have to see the indicators and symptoms of such and then there are those who can not stop talking about it. Either way it is a call for help and attention to this problem. Thank you gain for sharing this.

 Comment Written 10-Dec-2017


reply by the author on 10-Dec-2017
    Hi Tier, I started with a loneliness part 1 and 2, but this one went a different direction so I changed it to speak out. Denial is next. Then, I will go into shame and guilt. There's so much to cover! Thanks for reading! I'll go look for your suggestions and add to my list, if not already there. Thank you so much for your input. I really want to make sure I cover absolutely everything! Mel
Comment from ExperiencingLiphe
Excellent
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There are actual sexual abuse groups. True story! Saying it for the first time is super scary and I totally get why so many don't. Hell, I didn't for years! I hate the people who say well they should have said sooner... *Eye roll*

 Comment Written 09-Dec-2017


reply by the author on 10-Dec-2017
    Hi Meghan, I facilitate one a few times a year. It's really tough to get ladies to attend. I usually have more sign up and then a few will drop or not show the first night. For those that come, it really does help them. I'm covering guilt and shame next. Thanks for reading! Mel
Comment from BeasPeas
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Hi Mel. This is a very good write. It's entitled "loneliness," however it really doesn't dwell on that topic but rather on finding someone to confide in. I would either like to see more on the topic of loneliness in this chapter and how it pertains to the victim or label the chapter differently. I think some victims may indeed decide to stay with a predator because they don't want to be lonely and/or alone but that doesn't seem to be the topic here. Marilyn

 Comment Written 08-Dec-2017


reply by the author on 08-Dec-2017
    Hi Marilyn, thanks for catching that. I intended to go over more on loneliness, but it went a different direction. Boy, I have that happen a lot! Thanks for reading. Mel
Comment from smileycloud
Excellent
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have touched many souls with great advice and given hope where there was possibly none before
your writing is very intense
that is good because it is an incredibly deep and demanding situation your are writing about and extremely pain filled victims you are addressing
you are in full swing all the way through with hard hitting realizations and it is difficult when it is in a book on a screen or on paper than it is in person where a relationship can be built before the hard work is put into full gear but sometimes a slower pace might be less likely to frighten people
I am not sure how but it is essential that YOU built a relationship/connection with the reader and that will be dammed difficult and almost impossible when it is in a one sided conversation
blessings my dear girl
I am not too helpful but I will endeavour to follow you all the way through and when you have finished I will try to reccomend your book to a lot of people
have a smiley day
Lorraine

 Comment Written 08-Dec-2017


reply by the author on 08-Dec-2017
    Hi Lorraine, you are right! It's tough to build a relationship through something like this and a huge part of my counseling is gaining trust from that person. I plan to add bits of my story, which I think starts in the next post on denial. One thing that will help is for the reader to know I'm a survivor also. Thanks for reading and for your kind words of wisdom. I appreciate you:). Melissa
reply by smileycloud on 08-Dec-2017
    ::))
    you are such a blessing
    not only to others but to yourself as well
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
Excellent
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Good that you warned victims not to tell those who would doubt. Everyone can find someone trustworthy, and it need not be a close friend. Could be a doctor or reverend or teacher, etc.

 Comment Written 08-Dec-2017


reply by the author on 08-Dec-2017
    Hi Phyllis, unfortunately, not everyone is trustworthy. If the wrong person gets a hold of it, it creates even more isolation and feelings of worthlessness for the survivor. So hard for them to learn to trust again. Thanks for the great feedback. I appreciate it! Mel
Comment from S. Pumpkin
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As a young child, there was no one I felt I could trust. There weren't even laws in place yet to offer protection. I often tried speaking to God but eventually lost my faith that he cared. At the time of my abuse it was not socially accepted to talk about it. Personal issues were kept inside the family and not spoken about. No one wanted to know and if I approached them about it, I was punished for making trouble. It is hard to find someone to talk to when no one wants to know.

 Comment Written 07-Dec-2017


reply by the author on 07-Dec-2017
    Hi Sasha, so true, and I think even more so back then. It took me 17 years to tell someone. Thankfully, things have come a long ways and some people are now able to talk about it. There are still many people though that would rather think this doesn't exist. I'm heading to denial next, but so much more to cover. Thanks for reading. Mel
Comment from Teri7
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This is another great post about the abuse. I know I felt so dirty and it felt like everyone could see what had happened to me. I would shy away from people because of it. Not sure what category to put that under. Great job! love, Teri

 Comment Written 07-Dec-2017


reply by the author on 07-Dec-2017
    Hi Teri, that might go under isolation. I felt the same way. It took me 17 years to tell. I had no idea it would work into all of this. I will tackle denial next. So much more to cover! Thanks for reading and for sharing. Love you, Mel