Blood and Tears
Remember our heroes on Veterans Day, November 11th.68 total reviews
Comment from Lucian Carter
It's hard to say a lot in six words. Here, you capture a sense of violent death. However, had I not read your author's notes, I would not know it was dedicated to veterans. You could change the last line to
"War, blood, dust"
and just take the and out. You don't really need it.
As is, it's still a good piece, it just isn't quite specific enough to convey the message you wanted it to.
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2017
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It's hard to say a lot in six words. Here, you capture a sense of violent death. However, had I not read your author's notes, I would not know it was dedicated to veterans. You could change the last line to
"War, blood, dust"
and just take the and out. You don't really need it.
As is, it's still a good piece, it just isn't quite specific enough to convey the message you wanted it to.
Comment Written 08-Nov-2017
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2017
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This is a very positive suggestion and I thank you for it. I am glad to have had the opportunity to add author notes.
Comment from visionary1234
An 'ineffably' well written six worder, Brigitte! Every word was a jewel in this tiny beauty. Well done, in time for Veteran's Day! In Australia, for November 11th, we bought red poppies made from crepe paper, to wear in our button holes - for 'Remembrance Day'. The $$ went to the vets. :)Sharyn
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2017
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An 'ineffably' well written six worder, Brigitte! Every word was a jewel in this tiny beauty. Well done, in time for Veteran's Day! In Australia, for November 11th, we bought red poppies made from crepe paper, to wear in our button holes - for 'Remembrance Day'. The $$ went to the vets. :)Sharyn
Comment Written 08-Nov-2017
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2017
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Thank you for this kind review. May we never forget our heroes all over the world.
Blessings,
brigitte
Comment from GWinterwin
Good poem with a real message in few words. Thanks so much for your words of love and encouragement. I am a Viet Nam vet and many are truly thankful for our service but too many could care less about what anyone has given for this country. Those are the selfish ones only concerned about what they can get for nothing.
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2017
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Good poem with a real message in few words. Thanks so much for your words of love and encouragement. I am a Viet Nam vet and many are truly thankful for our service but too many could care less about what anyone has given for this country. Those are the selfish ones only concerned about what they can get for nothing.
Comment Written 07-Nov-2017
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2017
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My husband is also a Viet Nam Veteran. Thank you for serving. May we never forget the sacrifices of our heroes.
Blessings,
brigitte
Comment from Aussie
Good luck with your contest entry for the Six Words. Not easy to paint a picture or tell a story, you have and you have given thought to those who gave their lives for our freedom. Thanks for remembering them.
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2017
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Good luck with your contest entry for the Six Words. Not easy to paint a picture or tell a story, you have and you have given thought to those who gave their lives for our freedom. Thanks for remembering them.
Comment Written 07-Nov-2017
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2017
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I am honored and humbled by your comments. Thank you. May we never forget our heroes! Every day should be a day to celebrate them with reverance.
Blessings,
Brigitte
Comment from doggymad
Great work my friend considering the brevity of the work. I love the word ineffable as it has real depth. The sort of word that is essential is a brief work.
Best of luck in the contest with this one
hugs
Freda
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2017
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Great work my friend considering the brevity of the work. I love the word ineffable as it has real depth. The sort of word that is essential is a brief work.
Best of luck in the contest with this one
hugs
Freda
Comment Written 07-Nov-2017
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2017
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Thank you so much for this review. May we never forget the brave and true heroes that sacrificed ( and still do) for us.
Blessings,
Brigitte
Comment from tfawcus
It is good to see veterans honoured in this way. They are not always treated as they deserve to be, and validation of the worth we see in their actions and service is always welcome.
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2017
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It is good to see veterans honoured in this way. They are not always treated as they deserve to be, and validation of the worth we see in their actions and service is always welcome.
Comment Written 07-Nov-2017
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2017
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Thank you for these comments. I totally agree. May we never forget.
Blessings,
Brigitte
Comment from Elizabeth Daniels
You are very correct My son just spent 6 years in the Navy We all appreciate what our veterans do for us A very appropriate poem. Elizabeth Daniels.
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2017
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You are very correct My son just spent 6 years in the Navy We all appreciate what our veterans do for us A very appropriate poem. Elizabeth Daniels.
Comment Written 07-Nov-2017
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2017
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Thank you for your kind comments. May we never forget to thank those who served and still serve. The memory of the fallen must be honored. My husband is a Veteran, also.
Blessings,
brigitte
Comment from Cedar
Thank you, Brigitte, for your wonderful piece about all the veterans past and present. I am an old Vietnam vet, so I thank you for your kind words.
Good luck in the contest...Bill
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2017
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Thank you, Brigitte, for your wonderful piece about all the veterans past and present. I am an old Vietnam vet, so I thank you for your kind words.
Good luck in the contest...Bill
Comment Written 07-Nov-2017
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2017
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My husband is also a Viet Nam veteran. Thank you for serving. May we never forget the service of all Veterans. May the memory of the fallen be always kept safe.
Blessings,
Brigitte
Comment from H. Rebecca
Okay, I'm going to admit something here. I had to look up the definition of ineffable and, after doing so (the background information in my back pocket) this short, poignant poem makes complete sense.
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2017
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Okay, I'm going to admit something here. I had to look up the definition of ineffable and, after doing so (the background information in my back pocket) this short, poignant poem makes complete sense.
Comment Written 07-Nov-2017
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2017
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There are a few poets on this site that send me to the dictionary, frequently. Thank you for reading and reviewing.
Fan Friend,
Brigitte
Comment from Mark Valentine
A great Veteran's Day tribute. The word "ineffable" is perfect to try to articulate a sacrifice that most of us can't fathom. The word "cocktail", for me, serves to contrast that sacrifice with the relative lives of comfort that most of us lead. A great use of your six words.
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2017
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A great Veteran's Day tribute. The word "ineffable" is perfect to try to articulate a sacrifice that most of us can't fathom. The word "cocktail", for me, serves to contrast that sacrifice with the relative lives of comfort that most of us lead. A great use of your six words.
Comment Written 07-Nov-2017
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2017
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I thank you for this supportive review. Using six words to tell a story is very difficult. The image by Ski-II helped make this possible.
May we never forget.
Blessings,
brigitte
