It's Never Too Late
At Last Romance Finally Comes Along5 total reviews
Comment from Ricky1024
"Dating Romance Writing Prompt."
"Very nice and enjoyable."
"Flowed well, read well, and no Grammar issues."
"Descriptive Measures complimented Theme and Imagery."
"Adjective Content was excellent."
"Complete Synopsis-*****
"Nice jog here and good luck with this."
Dr. Ricky 1024.
reply by the author on 03-Aug-2017
"Dating Romance Writing Prompt."
"Very nice and enjoyable."
"Flowed well, read well, and no Grammar issues."
"Descriptive Measures complimented Theme and Imagery."
"Adjective Content was excellent."
"Complete Synopsis-*****
"Nice jog here and good luck with this."
Dr. Ricky 1024.
Comment Written 03-Aug-2017
reply by the author on 03-Aug-2017
-
Thank you for your support
Comment from Commando
A most commendable presentation here. It massaged my interest, as I read from start to finish. The moral of the story, "is crystal clear!" The Artwork by; MK Flood is awesome, and reminds me of our little ranch in the Smoky Mountains, at Pigeon Forge, (Dollywood) Tennessee. A most impressive entry into the "Dating Romance Contest." My best wishes to the Arthur for a win. It is most deserving.
reply by the author on 03-Aug-2017
A most commendable presentation here. It massaged my interest, as I read from start to finish. The moral of the story, "is crystal clear!" The Artwork by; MK Flood is awesome, and reminds me of our little ranch in the Smoky Mountains, at Pigeon Forge, (Dollywood) Tennessee. A most impressive entry into the "Dating Romance Contest." My best wishes to the Arthur for a win. It is most deserving.
Comment Written 03-Aug-2017
reply by the author on 03-Aug-2017
-
Thank you for your support and kindness
-
Yes, Ma'am!
Comment from Mistydawn
It's a well-written story kept my interest the entire time, the plot moves along nicely and the dialogue seems natural not forced. I did find one area that seems a bit confusing
"You still have the rodeo blood in your veins," Maggie remarked.
"I won!" She said all excited."
Overall I enjoyed your story.
reply by the author on 03-Aug-2017
It's a well-written story kept my interest the entire time, the plot moves along nicely and the dialogue seems natural not forced. I did find one area that seems a bit confusing
"You still have the rodeo blood in your veins," Maggie remarked.
"I won!" She said all excited."
Overall I enjoyed your story.
Comment Written 02-Aug-2017
reply by the author on 03-Aug-2017
-
He used to rodeo and she won the contest running her horse in the barrel racing contest
Comment from giraffmang
Hi there,
Fits the bill as far as the competition requirements go. It does need a tidy up as there are a lot of spags to contend with. I made some notes as I read which may be helpful-
The title should read 'It's Never Too Late'.
It's never to late to chase your dreams - too late.
she had been a roving reporter for her magazine covering the - you could delete 'for her magazine' here to avoid the repetition from the previous line.
of the assistants editors position she jumped at the chance - assistant.
She was past do for something good to happen in her life. - past due.
Justion in the past would not hesitate - Justin.
and yet so vonurable at times - vulnerable.
I was wondering if you might have changed your mind again. - I think this is supposed to be dialogue?
when he retire next week. - retires and you also need closing speech marks afterwards.
I 'm thankful to you for having faith in me and considering me for the position. Especially after all these years gone by.- this should be in speech marks as well.
out of her mind.to get to where she was - inset a space after the full stop and capital 'T'.
He encouraged to always never give up on her dreams - this reads awkwardly, maybe drop always or move it to before encouraged.
The last time she'd seen Justin was when she went to the rodeo in Montana to compete in the rodeo - you could streamline this to something like '...when she competed in the rodeo in Montana.'
slip through her fingers. "What was she thinking." - this is either direct speech or thought and as such would be 'What was I thinking'. Otherwise it doesn't need the quote marks.
upcoming is one word.
The week seemed to fly by, she was back at Justions office - Justin's.
He asked /She replied. - ALL following speech tags should start lower case unless a proper noun or an actual name.
He smiled at that and said," well being as you - the dialogue should start with a capital letter even if it comes mid-sentence as it does here.
"I will understand I'd you are busy," she said - not sure what you're trying to say here. Words missing?
"Your on." He replied. - You're.
" It's been a while'" he said grinning - delete the space after the opening speech marks and you need end punctuation before the closing speech marks.
"Is riding in the rodeo still a family thin?" He inquired. - thing?
As only two people are involved in the dialogue in the story, you don't necessarily need to attach a speech tag to every bit of dialogue as it is generally obvious who is speaking.
She spoke the and startled him - spoke then.
I better get to my horse or I will be late getting entered in the next event. - this should be inside speech marks.
"Your're going to make a spectacular entrance on Brandy " Justin said - You're, and you need end punctuation before the closing speech marks.
with wide shoulders muscled legs - insert a comma after shoulders.
The crowd roared bring him back - bringing.
"I heard! isn't it marvelous," - Isn't.
up and swung her around. Giving her a sudden kiss!" - delete the unnecessary speech marks from the end here.
"We better get going as well." It's a long ride back, we both have a lot to do before work in the morning. - move the closing speech marks to the very end here.
"Fine. Thank you" - need end punctuation before the closing speech marks.
until Justin was shaken her awake gently - shaking.
The were at her home - They.
All the best
GMG
reply by the author on 01-Aug-2017
Hi there,
Fits the bill as far as the competition requirements go. It does need a tidy up as there are a lot of spags to contend with. I made some notes as I read which may be helpful-
The title should read 'It's Never Too Late'.
It's never to late to chase your dreams - too late.
she had been a roving reporter for her magazine covering the - you could delete 'for her magazine' here to avoid the repetition from the previous line.
of the assistants editors position she jumped at the chance - assistant.
She was past do for something good to happen in her life. - past due.
Justion in the past would not hesitate - Justin.
and yet so vonurable at times - vulnerable.
I was wondering if you might have changed your mind again. - I think this is supposed to be dialogue?
when he retire next week. - retires and you also need closing speech marks afterwards.
I 'm thankful to you for having faith in me and considering me for the position. Especially after all these years gone by.- this should be in speech marks as well.
out of her mind.to get to where she was - inset a space after the full stop and capital 'T'.
He encouraged to always never give up on her dreams - this reads awkwardly, maybe drop always or move it to before encouraged.
The last time she'd seen Justin was when she went to the rodeo in Montana to compete in the rodeo - you could streamline this to something like '...when she competed in the rodeo in Montana.'
slip through her fingers. "What was she thinking." - this is either direct speech or thought and as such would be 'What was I thinking'. Otherwise it doesn't need the quote marks.
upcoming is one word.
The week seemed to fly by, she was back at Justions office - Justin's.
He asked /She replied. - ALL following speech tags should start lower case unless a proper noun or an actual name.
He smiled at that and said," well being as you - the dialogue should start with a capital letter even if it comes mid-sentence as it does here.
"I will understand I'd you are busy," she said - not sure what you're trying to say here. Words missing?
"Your on." He replied. - You're.
" It's been a while'" he said grinning - delete the space after the opening speech marks and you need end punctuation before the closing speech marks.
"Is riding in the rodeo still a family thin?" He inquired. - thing?
As only two people are involved in the dialogue in the story, you don't necessarily need to attach a speech tag to every bit of dialogue as it is generally obvious who is speaking.
She spoke the and startled him - spoke then.
I better get to my horse or I will be late getting entered in the next event. - this should be inside speech marks.
"Your're going to make a spectacular entrance on Brandy " Justin said - You're, and you need end punctuation before the closing speech marks.
with wide shoulders muscled legs - insert a comma after shoulders.
The crowd roared bring him back - bringing.
"I heard! isn't it marvelous," - Isn't.
up and swung her around. Giving her a sudden kiss!" - delete the unnecessary speech marks from the end here.
"We better get going as well." It's a long ride back, we both have a lot to do before work in the morning. - move the closing speech marks to the very end here.
"Fine. Thank you" - need end punctuation before the closing speech marks.
until Justin was shaken her awake gently - shaking.
The were at her home - They.
All the best
GMG
Comment Written 01-Aug-2017
reply by the author on 01-Aug-2017
-
Hope I fixed them all
Comment from BOO ghost
Love the presentation! Awe, romance contest. Who drew that picture? A real dandy. Grammar looks tight. Can tell is well written by looking at it. You readenough,you can always tell the good from the bad. this is good and holds BOO's interest,which s hard for a ghost to do. Got my figget spinner, he -- he. Like this paragraph and that power word you used. He had heard she was flying in for the interview so he looked his best in his western attire. She was so amazing, she could look so beautiful and yet so vonurable at times. I was wondering if you might have changed your mind again. Was that suppose to be vulnerable? But story held me interest.
Image by Cool Text: Free Logos and Buttons - Create An Image Just Like This
reply by the author on 01-Aug-2017
Love the presentation! Awe, romance contest. Who drew that picture? A real dandy. Grammar looks tight. Can tell is well written by looking at it. You readenough,you can always tell the good from the bad. this is good and holds BOO's interest,which s hard for a ghost to do. Got my figget spinner, he -- he. Like this paragraph and that power word you used. He had heard she was flying in for the interview so he looked his best in his western attire. She was so amazing, she could look so beautiful and yet so vonurable at times. I was wondering if you might have changed your mind again. Was that suppose to be vulnerable? But story held me interest.
Image by Cool Text: Free Logos and Buttons - Create An Image Just Like This
Comment Written 01-Aug-2017
reply by the author on 01-Aug-2017
-
Thanks BOO
-
BOO! BOO! BOO!
-
Hugs even though it's hard to hug a ghost hehe
-
Hugs back...
-
Awe