Piece by Piece
Things are seldom as they seem.48 total reviews
Comment from lyenochka
I can tell that Dean put you up to this. Ah, at least, this way, I can feel that he's still on the site. I have heard (perhaps from Dean) that horror and humor were two sides of the same coin. I liked the humor you injected into this with Miss Grumpy and the surprise killer as the sweet Natalie. I wasn't sure if the narrator was dead or just "armless."
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2024
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I can tell that Dean put you up to this. Ah, at least, this way, I can feel that he's still on the site. I have heard (perhaps from Dean) that horror and humor were two sides of the same coin. I liked the humor you injected into this with Miss Grumpy and the surprise killer as the sweet Natalie. I wasn't sure if the narrator was dead or just "armless."
Comment Written 08-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2024
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Yes, Dean could talk me into most anything, and usually did. LOL. This was way outside my comfort zone at the time. I agree that there needs to be some degree of humor in any story of life. The narrator wasn't dead, just mangled with parts missing. As always my dear, sweet friend, thanks for taking time out to read my old stories which offer nothing in return. I appreciate YOU more than I can say in words. :-)
Comment from Karen Cherry Threadgill
I didn't quite understand what you were going for, however, that did not stop me from liking it. I now owe you only 21 more reads. Cross your fingers, I think they finally fixed our wi-fi, Karen
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2023
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I didn't quite understand what you were going for, however, that did not stop me from liking it. I now owe you only 21 more reads. Cross your fingers, I think they finally fixed our wi-fi, Karen
Comment Written 18-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2023
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You don't owe me nothing. This isn't a reciprocal endeavor. LOL. This piece was posted because the famous Dean from the site asked me to take part in his contest. The main character got really drunk, but at some point the girl injected him with Ketamine, which cases hallucinations that cause him to imagine her body parts and blood at this house and behind the bushes. Until he learns that she's a serial kills who has chopped him up along with other in her freezer. Oh, well, it's my story and I'm sticking to it. :-) Thanks for sharing.
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i owe what i owe. I may save you for last.l will have to troll.
I like your stuff silly boy.
:-)
Comment from Brett Matthew West
Hitting on the boss's wife, that can lead to a heap of troubles.
A woman's arm, what a surprise to come home to.
Sounds like it all came out in that bathroom.
Eyeballs staring back at you in the bed, a nice surprise.
Freaky that Natalie turns out to be the killer and you the victim. Nice twist.
reply by the author on 14-Sep-2022
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Hitting on the boss's wife, that can lead to a heap of troubles.
A woman's arm, what a surprise to come home to.
Sounds like it all came out in that bathroom.
Eyeballs staring back at you in the bed, a nice surprise.
Freaky that Natalie turns out to be the killer and you the victim. Nice twist.
Comment Written 14-Sep-2022
reply by the author on 14-Sep-2022
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Thank you so much, Brett Matthew, for going back to read this old story, which doesn't offer any fan dollars. I think this is one of the stories that Dean, who used to be on the site, asked me to submit to his contest. I was new to the genre and pretty much a newbie at understanding the fundamentals of grammar and writing. Although, as we both know, I'm still in the elementary stages. LOL. I appreciate YOU, and all the time you've spent over the years with encouragement and suggestions to make me better. Of course, I like those chartreuse plus signs, but they are secondary to your continued supports. Thanks again, my friend! Ric
Comment from karenina
What a freak show! This was about at far away from your "Timmy" story as one could run, what with my limbs quaking and my nerves on synaptic overdrive! Imagine the millions Stephen King gets for this genre?! Not my bloody cup of tea, generally--but here again you provide enough thrills, chills, twists and turns to demand my attention! It's interesting to explore a writer I'm not familiar with-- No one will ever fault you with being typecast! Good read--Very Good Read!--Karenina
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2020
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What a freak show! This was about at far away from your "Timmy" story as one could run, what with my limbs quaking and my nerves on synaptic overdrive! Imagine the millions Stephen King gets for this genre?! Not my bloody cup of tea, generally--but here again you provide enough thrills, chills, twists and turns to demand my attention! It's interesting to explore a writer I'm not familiar with-- No one will ever fault you with being typecast! Good read--Very Good Read!--Karenina
Comment Written 16-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2020
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Hello, again, sweet Karenina! LOL. Yes, this is a little sick and twisted, as you'll find many of my stories can be. An old friend from this site convinced me to keep writing when I wanted to quit, kept telling me I had to get out of my comfort zone. She owned a publishing company and prodded me continuously. And yes, now being uncomfortable is like a drug. But that rush will never compare to the thrill of someone liking one of my stories, if only a single line, and spending their time sharing with me. Thank you so much!
Comment from sunnilicious
You made me want to watch the Texas Chainsaw Massacre movies. The eighties were filled with great horror flicks. I was young, but the boys around me we nuts for that stuff. Great visual imagery created. Twisted, however, great narrative storytelling. I ran out of 6ers, but this is a prizewinner. Be proud. Nice work.
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2018
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You made me want to watch the Texas Chainsaw Massacre movies. The eighties were filled with great horror flicks. I was young, but the boys around me we nuts for that stuff. Great visual imagery created. Twisted, however, great narrative storytelling. I ran out of 6ers, but this is a prizewinner. Be proud. Nice work.
Comment Written 22-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2018
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Thank you so much, Sunnilicious, for taking time to read one of my stories. Your kind words and generous review are greatly appreciated! I don't know what comes over us sometimes, when our minds can effortlessly conjure up these warped and twisted thoughts. Almost, as if someone else is writing them from another dimension. I guess it just goes to prove there is two sides to all of us, strange, and even stranger. :-)
Comment from Mistydawn
I absolutely loved it. You drew me in at the very beginning and kept me interested to the end. Of course, the little humor at the end was icing on the cake. Great job, I can't wait to read more.
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2017
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I absolutely loved it. You drew me in at the very beginning and kept me interested to the end. Of course, the little humor at the end was icing on the cake. Great job, I can't wait to read more.
Comment Written 17-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2017
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Thank you so much, MistyDawn, for taking time to read my humor... uh, I mean, horror story. I always try to add a little humor here and there, hoping not defuse and take the edge off the horror. Everyone thinks that I do it for readers. But in truth, I do it to break up the gore for myself so that I can sleep that night. LOL! Seriously, your kind words and extra-special six-star review are greatly appreciated. I'm glad you liked it. :-)
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I've written a couple of horror stories myself and I know what you mean about breaking up the gore.
One story I wrote, Mercy's killing I almost didn't finish. Strange things kept happening every time I'd sit down to write. It was like I stirred up the spirits or something. Scared the **** out of me.
Comment from Ulla
Hi Ric, I loved it. You really got a story going here and it's very well written. Especially the first two quaters or more. Seriously good indeed, catching and highly entertaining. I wish I had a six for you. Good luck in the contest. It deserves to do very well. All the best. Ulla:))
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2017
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Hi Ric, I loved it. You really got a story going here and it's very well written. Especially the first two quaters or more. Seriously good indeed, catching and highly entertaining. I wish I had a six for you. Good luck in the contest. It deserves to do very well. All the best. Ulla:))
Comment Written 17-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2017
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Thank you so much, Ulla, for taking time to read my humor... uh, I mean, horror story. Your kind words and generous review are greatly appreciated. :-)
Comment from smbau
Very descriptive horrific story... full of suspense. To events occur in two places, one at main character's house, the other at the office party. May consider revising the office party scene with a focus on the flow of stories events. The murderer taunting the victim in front of victim's friends did not read very real to me.
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2017
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Very descriptive horrific story... full of suspense. To events occur in two places, one at main character's house, the other at the office party. May consider revising the office party scene with a focus on the flow of stories events. The murderer taunting the victim in front of victim's friends did not read very real to me.
Comment Written 17-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2017
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That scene was at the hospital. Sorry it didn't read very real to you. As I'm sure you've heard, there is usually a lot of truth in fiction, and there is in this story too. It really happened! It's one of those stories that makes the reader do a little thinking on his own and take each sentence at a time. Although it is written with simple words, the story can be too complex for many. Thanks for reading and your comments.
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l like your choice of words. Great writers simplify complexities for their readers. For clarification: "As I?m ....open my eyes... blurry." may be adding the lights, white ceilings and persons hovering over the character with white/blue overalls...would have been helpful. Help the reader imagine the scene as you need them. ps. preference is relative my 2 cents. thks
Comment from Mustang Patty
Wow, you managed to squeeze in quite a bit of gore into your story, didn't you? I'm amazed this didn't do better in the contest. It seems to jump off the page and tell a great horror story.
The only criticism I have is the ending felt rushed - I felt like I wanted to know more about Natalie and her crimes.
thank you for sharing,
~patty~
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2017
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Wow, you managed to squeeze in quite a bit of gore into your story, didn't you? I'm amazed this didn't do better in the contest. It seems to jump off the page and tell a great horror story.
The only criticism I have is the ending felt rushed - I felt like I wanted to know more about Natalie and her crimes.
thank you for sharing,
~patty~
Comment Written 17-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2017
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Thank you so much for taking time to read my humor... uh, I mean, horror story. Yes, the whole thing was a little rushed, actually. Dean had asked me while I out of town in Atlanta to participate. I agreed, then forgot all about the contest until the night before. I spent a couple hours writing it, read it through once and made a few corrections, and sent it on its way. It could have been much better, but honestly, I too thought it fit the contest well. I was just to join in with such a talented bunch of writers. Your kind words, comments, and generous review are greatly appreciated.
Comment from emptypage
Okay.... I like the story. It's creepy as hell, but I love the idea that his hallucinations were all wrong... but who is the "friend" who wasn't quite frozen? Please say it wasn't the dog. But I don't see a reference to anyone else from the top half of the story--just the two main characters sans the dog.
So, who got frozen?
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2017
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Okay.... I like the story. It's creepy as hell, but I love the idea that his hallucinations were all wrong... but who is the "friend" who wasn't quite frozen? Please say it wasn't the dog. But I don't see a reference to anyone else from the top half of the story--just the two main characters sans the dog.
So, who got frozen?
Comment Written 17-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2017
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The cop who was talking to his boss explaining the situation and about Natalie when he told him that his friend's (who is the main character) body part weren't even frozen yet. LOL! It can get a little confusing if you miss just a line or a few words. I like to make readers do some thinking for themselves. Thank you so much for taking time to read my humor/horror story. Your kind words and generous review are greatly appreciated.
Oh, shoot. How did I not figure that out??
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I try to use simple words, but I don't give away all the answers. I like to make readers have to think. But in that, you only have to miss a word or two to miss something. There are usually always a few people who don't like that I won't spell everything out with details. I told one guy that I don't write nursery rhymes or kiddie books. Come to think of it, I've never seen him again. And the truth is, I wasn't meaning to be nasty or sarcastic, and I do wish I had said it different way. LOL! Your, "Oh, shoot," got me tickled, so as you can see, I wrote you a book. I just like nice people, and I've got a feeling about you. And no, I'm not some weirdo. Promise! :-)
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I am a nice people!
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See, I was right!
