I'm Gonna
Won't someone listen?54 total reviews
Comment from rama devi
Bravo for a powerful poem, my friend. awesome theme--tragically relevant, and well-explored with superb flow and rhyming as well as a striking presentation.
one suggestion (optional):
Both of my parents fear me, (; or --)
thank God they brought a gun.
Great slant rhyme with first and hearse
Poignant, memorable closing.
Bravo
Warmly, rd
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2015
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Bravo for a powerful poem, my friend. awesome theme--tragically relevant, and well-explored with superb flow and rhyming as well as a striking presentation.
one suggestion (optional):
Both of my parents fear me, (; or --)
thank God they brought a gun.
Great slant rhyme with first and hearse
Poignant, memorable closing.
Bravo
Warmly, rd
Comment Written 19-Jan-2015
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2015
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Thank you, Rama, and this poem was written to vent my frustrations. A friend of my daughter's was found hanging in her home last Wednesday. She was only 17. It had gotten out on a variety of social networking sites that she was gay. For over a month after that revelation, she was bullied, belittled and badgered by certain members of her school. Many attempted to get it to cease on her behalf, yet it still continued. That's the thing about the internet. Bullies are no longer relegated to spewing their hatred at their targets to school hours, or when they find the individual out and about. Now, they can do it 24/7 without ever having to leave their home.
I in no way condone a gay lifestyle. It goes against the grain of everything I was taught. However, I feel that choice is between the person that chooses it, and the All Mighty. It is not our place to judge. Counsel, yes. But never to judge.
Her nine year old brother found her hanging and blue when he'd arrived home from school that day. Can you imagine what was going through that poor little boy's mind?
This poem was a way to vent my frustration at such a senseless and needless tragedy.
Thanks so much again for your thoughtful review. It is greatly appreciated.
~Dean
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So sorry to hear of that tragic suicide. So incredibly sad how cruel people can be...
Love and light, rd
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We were all in shock, Rama. She was normally such an outgoing, witty girl. It's a tragedy all the way around.
Thanks again. :}
Be well~ DK
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Total tragedy. So sorry.
Best, rd
Comment from JudyS
Dean, Excellent writing and subject. It's hard to grasp the facts and numbers of youth suicides and attempts. Thank you so much for bringing this to our attention. Great job. Have a good week. Judy
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Dean, Excellent writing and subject. It's hard to grasp the facts and numbers of youth suicides and attempts. Thank you so much for bringing this to our attention. Great job. Have a good week. Judy
Comment Written 18-Jan-2015
Comment from rod007
This is a very serious concern and the poem highlights the pain the end of their life brings but also the heartache of the grieving parents. The key as you rightly pointed out is involvement of parents in their lives but some will do it anyway because of severe depression. And depression, I'm sure most of us know about as that darkness has hit us at some point in our lives. Well done, Dean.
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This is a very serious concern and the poem highlights the pain the end of their life brings but also the heartache of the grieving parents. The key as you rightly pointed out is involvement of parents in their lives but some will do it anyway because of severe depression. And depression, I'm sure most of us know about as that darkness has hit us at some point in our lives. Well done, Dean.
Comment Written 18-Jan-2015
Comment from rstonerjr
Well you have succeeded in opening my eyes to a topic I was not aware of so success was achieved here for that if no other.Your presentation borders on theater as presented visually and the sound overwhelmed me with confusion at first. I rarely have speakers on and got quite a surprise here. I loved the rhyme and rhythm so smooth and easy to read,great flow. Love the social context and effort to create a need for awareness.Top shelf work for me.
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Well you have succeeded in opening my eyes to a topic I was not aware of so success was achieved here for that if no other.Your presentation borders on theater as presented visually and the sound overwhelmed me with confusion at first. I rarely have speakers on and got quite a surprise here. I loved the rhyme and rhythm so smooth and easy to read,great flow. Love the social context and effort to create a need for awareness.Top shelf work for me.
Comment Written 18-Jan-2015
Comment from alf collier
Hi Dean. This contains a very strong message disguised in a real harmonious cadence that is pleasing to read. I'm not up with the technical terms but I liked the rhythm and flow the words give. Thank you, I enjoyed this, alf
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Hi Dean. This contains a very strong message disguised in a real harmonious cadence that is pleasing to read. I'm not up with the technical terms but I liked the rhythm and flow the words give. Thank you, I enjoyed this, alf
Comment Written 18-Jan-2015
Comment from Linda Engel
heart rendering piece about the pain of suicide. I have only had one person close to me commit suicide and I pray that never happens again. After reading your poem I just want to grab my grandbabies and love them so much. Hope to protect them and may they never know that sorrow. Thank you Dean for sharing such a meaningful subject matter that needs our attention.
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heart rendering piece about the pain of suicide. I have only had one person close to me commit suicide and I pray that never happens again. After reading your poem I just want to grab my grandbabies and love them so much. Hope to protect them and may they never know that sorrow. Thank you Dean for sharing such a meaningful subject matter that needs our attention.
Comment Written 18-Jan-2015
Comment from Pearl Edwards
This is such a serious problem with repercussions that never go away for those left behinds. Very powerful and an emotional write Dean, with a good finish in the thoughts of the desperate.
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This is such a serious problem with repercussions that never go away for those left behinds. Very powerful and an emotional write Dean, with a good finish in the thoughts of the desperate.
Comment Written 18-Jan-2015
Comment from bob cullen
I can't fault your writing whether it be poetry or prose.
Your ability to create on any subject makes me envious. As does your talent with your writing backgrounds.
reply by the author on 18-Jan-2015
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I can't fault your writing whether it be poetry or prose.
Your ability to create on any subject makes me envious. As does your talent with your writing backgrounds.
Comment Written 18-Jan-2015
reply by the author on 18-Jan-2015
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Thank you very much for those complimentary comments, Bob. I'm certainly very happy to know that you feel that way, my friend.
~Dean :}
Comment from Treischel
You painted a poignant portrait of the disjointed thoughts of a suicidal teen, along with potential regrets. Your words are very true. Just the other day i was trying to talk a 10 year girl who was on line with me out of suicidal thoughts because her "boyfriend" disappointed her ( broke her heart) at a dance. I hope i succeeded. I havent seen her on line lately.
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You painted a poignant portrait of the disjointed thoughts of a suicidal teen, along with potential regrets. Your words are very true. Just the other day i was trying to talk a 10 year girl who was on line with me out of suicidal thoughts because her "boyfriend" disappointed her ( broke her heart) at a dance. I hope i succeeded. I havent seen her on line lately.
Comment Written 17-Jan-2015
Comment from Pullmanspb
Had to force myself to read this, as I worked so long with many people with many suicide attempts. You did a fine (if such a word is apropos) of depicting the despair and futility and anger felt by so many suicidal teens and adults.
Steven
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Had to force myself to read this, as I worked so long with many people with many suicide attempts. You did a fine (if such a word is apropos) of depicting the despair and futility and anger felt by so many suicidal teens and adults.
Steven
Comment Written 17-Jan-2015
