Vision and Sound: Their Stories
Viewing comments for Chapter 26 "More Discussion & More Treatment"Two souls that meet as strangers on earth.
20 total reviews
Comment from Tatarka2
I really liked this chapter and I see why it won the Book of the Month" contest. The premise is so intriguing. The language was not, in this chapter, and obstacle to my enjoyment of the story. It seems you've cut back on a lot of the more wordy dialogue, which makes it easier to read, and enhances the story, in my opinion. Maybe it was my lack of imagination all along which put me off reading these. I thought this was very believable and well-written. I'll be following this story now, eager to see what will happen next. Again, I commend you on writing a period piece from 500 AD. What a daunting task.
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I really liked this chapter and I see why it won the Book of the Month" contest. The premise is so intriguing. The language was not, in this chapter, and obstacle to my enjoyment of the story. It seems you've cut back on a lot of the more wordy dialogue, which makes it easier to read, and enhances the story, in my opinion. Maybe it was my lack of imagination all along which put me off reading these. I thought this was very believable and well-written. I'll be following this story now, eager to see what will happen next. Again, I commend you on writing a period piece from 500 AD. What a daunting task.
Comment Written 19-Nov-2014
Comment from Contests
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2014
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 A seven star rating from the Contest Committee for the recognition this post has received from the FanStory community. While this was not a Contest Committee decision, the committee recognizes this achievement with a seven star review. |
Comment Written 19-Nov-2014
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2014
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Wow. That is really cool. I am a little shocked to be honest. I learned it all right here. I never wrote a book in my life. Thank you so much. mikey
Comment from write hand blue
I haven't read the previous chapters so I can't comment on the plot.
This is a creative piece of writing, with good descriptions and visuals. Good luck in the competition. :) Mel.
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I haven't read the previous chapters so I can't comment on the plot.
This is a creative piece of writing, with good descriptions and visuals. Good luck in the competition. :) Mel.
Comment Written 11-Nov-2014
Comment from faragon
It's nice to see that Julia is understanding what Trellitia is trying to tell her in an effort to keep her safe. I like the way you break up the stories between the two main characters.
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It's nice to see that Julia is understanding what Trellitia is trying to tell her in an effort to keep her safe. I like the way you break up the stories between the two main characters.
Comment Written 22-Oct-2014
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
Interesting chapter, Mikey. I think it's wonderful that the mom finally came to the right person to help her sweet daughter. The church in those days was drunk with its own power!
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Interesting chapter, Mikey. I think it's wonderful that the mom finally came to the right person to help her sweet daughter. The church in those days was drunk with its own power!
Comment Written 15-Oct-2014
Comment from gypsycaravan
Sad to think that today so much harm still comes to people in the name of religion. Raped women get stoned to death. People killed or beheaded if they don't accept a certain religion. I hope Valerius is able to help and save the child.
I love this line. I
Any gulf is easily breeched when the bridge is discovered.
Is this a famous quote or your words? Very profound. Nice work, mikey.
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Sad to think that today so much harm still comes to people in the name of religion. Raped women get stoned to death. People killed or beheaded if they don't accept a certain religion. I hope Valerius is able to help and save the child.
I love this line. I
Any gulf is easily breeched when the bridge is discovered.
Is this a famous quote or your words? Very profound. Nice work, mikey.
Comment Written 14-Oct-2014
Comment from robina1978
I might have missed one or two chapters but it is easy to catch up. I really enjoy the way your story is going. Thanks for sharing.
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I might have missed one or two chapters but it is easy to catch up. I really enjoy the way your story is going. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 14-Oct-2014
Comment from Sankey
Going along real good mate. Keeps me going so it must be good. Keep up the good work as I used to tell my students ha. One spag this time. We continue (-k)now as Julia and Trellitia continue their discussion.
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Going along real good mate. Keeps me going so it must be good. Keep up the good work as I used to tell my students ha. One spag this time. We continue (-k)now as Julia and Trellitia continue their discussion.
Comment Written 14-Oct-2014
Comment from ProjectBluebook
Cute picture. Obviously you did your research and a lot of work went into this manuscript. I'm started to get a groove. i'm starting to get a clearer mental image of this dark ages themed novel. SPAG looks good. I like the author notes as a reference guide for dummies like me. Hahaha. the mizzen, lugsails and jiggers look tight as a banjo and riding smooother than a clipper ship on the sea. Outstanding job! I can clearly see the extra work you are investing in this promising novel. Count your doubloon. do loco yep, my power was off.
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Cute picture. Obviously you did your research and a lot of work went into this manuscript. I'm started to get a groove. i'm starting to get a clearer mental image of this dark ages themed novel. SPAG looks good. I like the author notes as a reference guide for dummies like me. Hahaha. the mizzen, lugsails and jiggers look tight as a banjo and riding smooother than a clipper ship on the sea. Outstanding job! I can clearly see the extra work you are investing in this promising novel. Count your doubloon. do loco yep, my power was off.
Comment Written 13-Oct-2014
Comment from nelliesellie
Julia is learning the need to not tell everything. She puts her self and her friends in danger. Sometimes her sightings may be of value, but she needs to speak of them only with people that understand. Valerius discovered a little girl who is lonely. She also has talent that needs to be nurtured. Great work.
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Julia is learning the need to not tell everything. She puts her self and her friends in danger. Sometimes her sightings may be of value, but she needs to speak of them only with people that understand. Valerius discovered a little girl who is lonely. She also has talent that needs to be nurtured. Great work.
Comment Written 13-Oct-2014
