Second Chances
Viewing comments for Chapter 1 "Back to School"Who is Zoe Vann? A second chance or a reminder?
14 total reviews
Comment from Liz O'Neill
You've got a good setting for some kind of a plot here: " I usually avoided this building at all costs, though, as it was an alarmingly small space considering NYU's impressive student population, including about 20,000 undergraduates." This could stir some serious discussion about their relationship and what should happen. That could be in future chapters which I look forward to.
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You've got a good setting for some kind of a plot here: " I usually avoided this building at all costs, though, as it was an alarmingly small space considering NYU's impressive student population, including about 20,000 undergraduates." This could stir some serious discussion about their relationship and what should happen. That could be in future chapters which I look forward to.
Comment Written 29-Jan-2024
Comment from barbara.wilkey
Sounds like Zoe has a lot going on in her life. I can't wait to read more. I just became a friend, so I don't miss any of your writings. You're very good. Thank you for sharing this post with us.
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2024
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Sounds like Zoe has a lot going on in her life. I can't wait to read more. I just became a friend, so I don't miss any of your writings. You're very good. Thank you for sharing this post with us.
Comment Written 26-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2024
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Thank you so much for reading and leaving your thoughts! I really appreciate the feedback! And thanks for following me, looking forward to hearing more from you!
Comment from John Ciarmello
I'm going to have to go back and read chapter one. This is an intriguing start to a potentially great story.
The characters are right in line and have distinct differences, raising questions about Zoe and Mel.
I enjoyed the read. Best, JohnC
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I'm going to have to go back and read chapter one. This is an intriguing start to a potentially great story.
The characters are right in line and have distinct differences, raising questions about Zoe and Mel.
I enjoyed the read. Best, JohnC
Comment Written 26-Jan-2024
Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
Well, this is an excellent read which I enjoyed! Your story flowed well with only one error noted ( hair shaved into a high and tight (bun?). The dialogue is excellent and credible and the pace is good holding my interest all the way through. Your text messages are cleverly inserted for contrast and to add a further layer to the story. Nicely done, Allieas! Thanks for sharing. Debbie
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2024
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Well, this is an excellent read which I enjoyed! Your story flowed well with only one error noted ( hair shaved into a high and tight (bun?). The dialogue is excellent and credible and the pace is good holding my interest all the way through. Your text messages are cleverly inserted for contrast and to add a further layer to the story. Nicely done, Allieas! Thanks for sharing. Debbie
Comment Written 24-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2024
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Thank you so much for reading and your kind feedback! A "high and tight," is a military-style haircut, though I can see how it sounds confusing if you're not familiar with it. I may change the way that's described. Thanks again!
Comment from Ric Myworld
I've now read three chapters of your writing, all different, but each with the same smooth flow of words and an inner subject knowledge. As they say, "write what you know," and you do it so well. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 24-Jan-2024
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I've now read three chapters of your writing, all different, but each with the same smooth flow of words and an inner subject knowledge. As they say, "write what you know," and you do it so well. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 24-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 24-Jan-2024
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Awe, thank you so much for taking the time to read so many of my chapters, and the compliment! I'm so glad you're enjoying my stories!
Comment from Wayne Fowler
Nicely written.
Sounds like real romance might loom in her near future. And I don't mean with Tyler Hudson, either.
Good luck with the book.
reply by the author on 24-Jan-2024
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Nicely written.
Sounds like real romance might loom in her near future. And I don't mean with Tyler Hudson, either.
Good luck with the book.
Comment Written 24-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 24-Jan-2024
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Thanks for reading and leaving a comment! I agree, Tyler and Zoe don't seem to be a good match haha
Comment from Navada
Zoe's non-committal response says a lot right there. Tyler sounds pretty pushy and rather poorly behaved. No wonder she is attracted by the sight of a man in uniform at this point! :)
reply by the author on 23-Jan-2024
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Zoe's non-committal response says a lot right there. Tyler sounds pretty pushy and rather poorly behaved. No wonder she is attracted by the sight of a man in uniform at this point! :)
Comment Written 23-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 23-Jan-2024
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Agreed! Zoe and Tyler are not a great match, and I'd say Tyler needs to do some work on himself! Thanks so much for reading and sharing your thoughts, I'm excited you read more than one chapter!
Comment from thoughtgame2
I see no issues in this read. Also,It flows very well, and takes the reader... right out of their seats, and lands them in the paradox. I really enjoyed this piece, thank you for sharing. Keep writing.
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2024
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I see no issues in this read. Also,It flows very well, and takes the reader... right out of their seats, and lands them in the paradox. I really enjoyed this piece, thank you for sharing. Keep writing.
Comment Written 21-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2024
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Thank you so much for reading and taking the time to comment. I'm glad it flows well!
Comment from royowen
I remember hearing somewhere that the ultimate aphrodisiac for a girl was simply being loved, it was that that swung her head, and this Tyler certainly does love her, he puts up with her fickleness it seems, but then there are so many attractive men in uniform well done, great story, blessings Roy
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2024
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I remember hearing somewhere that the ultimate aphrodisiac for a girl was simply being loved, it was that that swung her head, and this Tyler certainly does love her, he puts up with her fickleness it seems, but then there are so many attractive men in uniform well done, great story, blessings Roy
Comment Written 21-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2024
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Thanks for reading and your comment!
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Well done
Comment from RShipp
"NYU public safety officers so don't count as men in uniform." That was pointedly funny!
The dialogue between the two girls seemed very life-like. Enjoyed!
Looking forward to chapter two- although I hope she dumps the temper-infested boyfriend...
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"NYU public safety officers so don't count as men in uniform." That was pointedly funny!
The dialogue between the two girls seemed very life-like. Enjoyed!
Looking forward to chapter two- although I hope she dumps the temper-infested boyfriend...
Comment Written 17-Dec-2019
