The Mongoose and the Cobra
One of nature's dealiest battles...77 total reviews
Comment from ckevans
Hello author,
Now this is the kind of work I find written well. A high standard of creativity and word usage. I have a library filled with books of poetry and there is one poet, your work reminds me of, but I can't recall the name. Good work..
Kevin
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2014
Hello author,
Now this is the kind of work I find written well. A high standard of creativity and word usage. I have a library filled with books of poetry and there is one poet, your work reminds me of, but I can't recall the name. Good work..
Kevin
Comment Written 06-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2014
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Thanks so much, Kevin. I certainly appreciate your high praise and thoughtful feedback, my friend. :)
Comment from kristo81
Magnificent, a brilliant 5 verse poem with pulsating rhythm and impressive art work to boot. The tension was maintained until the final denouement at the end of the 4th stanza.
My only reservation which, prevented the award of a perfect 6, was the 5th stanza, which fell short of the perfect rhythm of the other verses. I recommend that the second line be rewritten thus; "the animal world, with frightful tales, and stories often told" Well done I'll certainly add you to my reading list
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2014
Magnificent, a brilliant 5 verse poem with pulsating rhythm and impressive art work to boot. The tension was maintained until the final denouement at the end of the 4th stanza.
My only reservation which, prevented the award of a perfect 6, was the 5th stanza, which fell short of the perfect rhythm of the other verses. I recommend that the second line be rewritten thus; "the animal world, with frightful tales, and stories often told" Well done I'll certainly add you to my reading list
Comment Written 06-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2014
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Thanks for the high praise, and for the fine suggestion as well, kristo81. I will certainly look into that stanza, and see what I can do for you.
I sincerely appreciate your excellent feedback. :)
Comment from madhatter1977
Rudyard Kipling and India - an amazing country that I've visited. I've seen cobras there in towns or cities, drugged and de-fanged for tourist photos. The story is so well told and I'm sorry not to be able to give it a six. Your talent shines again, Dean! Best wishes, Pete :)
reply by the author on 05-Sep-2014
Rudyard Kipling and India - an amazing country that I've visited. I've seen cobras there in towns or cities, drugged and de-fanged for tourist photos. The story is so well told and I'm sorry not to be able to give it a six. Your talent shines again, Dean! Best wishes, Pete :)
Comment Written 05-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 05-Sep-2014
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Thanks, Pete, and no sixes are necessary, my friend. I'm just really happy that you enjoyed it. :)
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Great battle poem! Well done mate :)
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:)
Comment from Titan Black
Yeah, you definitely have been watching too much
animal planet. Nevertheless, you were very creative.
And you poetic alliteration is always on point.
Keep doing your thing.
reply by the author on 05-Sep-2014
Yeah, you definitely have been watching too much
animal planet. Nevertheless, you were very creative.
And you poetic alliteration is always on point.
Keep doing your thing.
Comment Written 05-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 05-Sep-2014
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Thanks, Titan Black, I really appreciate that. You keep doing your as well, my friend. :)
Comment from michaelcahill
Love anything about nature especially the cool animals that inhabit it. You've captured this battle perfectly. The attitudes of the two participants are on the money considering their positions in the animal kingdom. What a surprise to the cobra I bet! The writing is smooth and easy to read, presented beautifully as always. mikey
reply by the author on 05-Sep-2014
Love anything about nature especially the cool animals that inhabit it. You've captured this battle perfectly. The attitudes of the two participants are on the money considering their positions in the animal kingdom. What a surprise to the cobra I bet! The writing is smooth and easy to read, presented beautifully as always. mikey
Comment Written 05-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 05-Sep-2014
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Thanks, Mikey. I really appreciate the review, my friend, and I'm very happy that you liked it. :)
Comment from Patrick G Cox
Hi Dean Kuch,
Good tale told in the style of Kiplings 'Rickitikitavi', the mongoose is a superb hunter and his special dish is, of course, snake served fresh.
Just one thought though, snake offspring fend for themselves from the get-go, the parent is notoriously absent, probably wisely.
Patrick
reply by the author on 04-Sep-2014
Hi Dean Kuch,
Good tale told in the style of Kiplings 'Rickitikitavi', the mongoose is a superb hunter and his special dish is, of course, snake served fresh.
Just one thought though, snake offspring fend for themselves from the get-go, the parent is notoriously absent, probably wisely.
Patrick
Comment Written 04-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 04-Sep-2014
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Thanks, Patrick. I appreciate that.
Comment from Ridley Williams
Hello Dean,
I laughed when I read your author's notes...my weakness is the history and science channels. My wife hates it, when I've just seen something fascinating early in the morning, and I wake her to tell her about the amazing subject matter, lol. She insists that I wait until after her first cup of coffee! My, my, where has curiosity gone?
I also appreciated your story of the snake and mongoose. My friend has three cats that kill rattlesnakes. They surround them just out of reach, darting back each time the snake strikes. They finally wear the snake down, and when its attention is drawn away by one of the cats, the other ponces for the kill. They then eat the thing and bring the rattle back to their master. Weird, huh?
Anyway, Dean, I enjoy the read as it is delivered in an excellent meter and rhyme, making for a great story. Well done, my friend, nice work.
Hope all is well in your "neck of the woods", later, Bill
reply by the author on 04-Sep-2014
Hello Dean,
I laughed when I read your author's notes...my weakness is the history and science channels. My wife hates it, when I've just seen something fascinating early in the morning, and I wake her to tell her about the amazing subject matter, lol. She insists that I wait until after her first cup of coffee! My, my, where has curiosity gone?
I also appreciated your story of the snake and mongoose. My friend has three cats that kill rattlesnakes. They surround them just out of reach, darting back each time the snake strikes. They finally wear the snake down, and when its attention is drawn away by one of the cats, the other ponces for the kill. They then eat the thing and bring the rattle back to their master. Weird, huh?
Anyway, Dean, I enjoy the read as it is delivered in an excellent meter and rhyme, making for a great story. Well done, my friend, nice work.
Hope all is well in your "neck of the woods", later, Bill
Comment Written 04-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 04-Sep-2014
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Thanks, Bill, and yeah it's okay, I suppose. I appreciate the review. :)
Comment from country ranch writer
glad you like this program too see, I am not the only one who likes these it has a lot of good stuff on there and I love to watch the animals. I am an avid animal lover.
reply by the author on 04-Sep-2014
glad you like this program too see, I am not the only one who likes these it has a lot of good stuff on there and I love to watch the animals. I am an avid animal lover.
Comment Written 04-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 04-Sep-2014
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Thanks, CRW, I really appreciate the sixer and your kind comments. :)
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welcome my friend
Comment from robina1978
I love your rhyming poem. I think we have seen this as well not so long ago. We also watch animal planet nearly every night. You learn so much.
reply by the author on 04-Sep-2014
I love your rhyming poem. I think we have seen this as well not so long ago. We also watch animal planet nearly every night. You learn so much.
Comment Written 04-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 04-Sep-2014
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Thanks, Ine, and I know I do. I really appreciate your review. have a lovely week.
Dean
Comment from Just2Write
"You think you'll make a meal of me," the slinky serpent asks?
should be:
"You think you'll make a meal of me?" the slinky serpent asks.
Yes, Rudyard would have liked this poem - and doncha' dare quit watching animal channel. Loved the poem that was birthed from your viewings there.
Beautiful flow in iambic Heptameter.
Rose.
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2014
"You think you'll make a meal of me," the slinky serpent asks?
should be:
"You think you'll make a meal of me?" the slinky serpent asks.
Yes, Rudyard would have liked this poem - and doncha' dare quit watching animal channel. Loved the poem that was birthed from your viewings there.
Beautiful flow in iambic Heptameter.
Rose.
Comment Written 03-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2014
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Thanks, Rose, I really appreciate that! :)