Make That Two Orders To-Go
Not exactly a homily.37 total reviews
Comment from onebrit
This had me laughing out loud, it's so funny and at least as believable as the original story. I am always amazed at the power of other peoples imaginations. Well done!
reply by the author on 21-Aug-2014
  |
This had me laughing out loud, it's so funny and at least as believable as the original story. I am always amazed at the power of other peoples imaginations. Well done!
Comment Written 21-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 21-Aug-2014
-
Thank you so much, onebrit. It's always good to find someone with a sense of humor. I'm delighted you enjoyed. Peace, Lee
Comment from mfowler
Oh, how I wish for a nor-wester these days. Your rather feisty Eve (or adam 2) really has a prick-ly tongue and a sassy attitude. By the sounds of this version, Adam would never have discovered the old 'hummana-hummana-hummana' without her stirring. I love how Adam is painted as a one dimensional character who just doesn't understand women. Haven't things changed? (LOL) His interest in how Eve pees was a fascination for me, as was the discovery of breasts. That bit could not have been less erotic, but it does remind one of early experiences. The "America-speak' of Eve sounds decidedly 'Humpwhistle' in character, but it never fails to amuse:If you're into 'bros', buster, you'd better rearrange your priorities. Or light out for Frisco. Loved the ending with its Conan/caveman mixed reference..just added humour at the right time.
reply by the author on 21-Aug-2014
|
Oh, how I wish for a nor-wester these days. Your rather feisty Eve (or adam 2) really has a prick-ly tongue and a sassy attitude. By the sounds of this version, Adam would never have discovered the old 'hummana-hummana-hummana' without her stirring. I love how Adam is painted as a one dimensional character who just doesn't understand women. Haven't things changed? (LOL) His interest in how Eve pees was a fascination for me, as was the discovery of breasts. That bit could not have been less erotic, but it does remind one of early experiences. The "America-speak' of Eve sounds decidedly 'Humpwhistle' in character, but it never fails to amuse:If you're into 'bros', buster, you'd better rearrange your priorities. Or light out for Frisco. Loved the ending with its Conan/caveman mixed reference..just added humour at the right time.
Comment Written 21-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 21-Aug-2014
-
Thank you, Mark. Adam and Eve pose such fertile targets. I've always supposed that Eve was the catalyst to all things human.
And I have a secret theory that America-speak was the first language. But it got lost over during one set of wars or another, only to pop back up again in a place called America. Go figure. Glad you enjoyed, my friend. Peace, Lee
Comment from DALLAS01
OMG. I rarely stray from poetry but glad I did tonight. Or let me re-phrase that, this morning. this is absolutely one of the funniest things I have ever read. Think I'll turn in on this one. Sorry, I am out of sixes.
reply by the author on 21-Aug-2014
|
OMG. I rarely stray from poetry but glad I did tonight. Or let me re-phrase that, this morning. this is absolutely one of the funniest things I have ever read. Think I'll turn in on this one. Sorry, I am out of sixes.
Comment Written 21-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 21-Aug-2014
-
Thanks so much, DALLAS. Glad you enjoyed. Peace, Lee
-
:.)
Comment from michaelcahill
So this is what it would read like if one of my crazy ideas were written properly. Hahaha. Love it. The smile never left my face and I laughed a lot. I won't officially replace the original story, but secretly this is the version that will always be in my mind when it is discussed. Great piece. mikey
reply by the author on 21-Aug-2014
|
So this is what it would read like if one of my crazy ideas were written properly. Hahaha. Love it. The smile never left my face and I laughed a lot. I won't officially replace the original story, but secretly this is the version that will always be in my mind when it is discussed. Great piece. mikey
Comment Written 20-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 21-Aug-2014
-
Hey, Mikey, thank you. I've had some fun with Adam and Eve before. I guess they're easy targets. Glad you enjoyed.
Peace, Lee
Comment from Narvik
Better than the original. I bet God's up there scratching his almighty head, saying, "Yeah, that's how I should have done it." He left too much of the nitty gritty eroticism out of the story.
This is probably how it would've been. Guy sees a chick for the first time in human history, he's gonna think she's some kind of freak, until he starts noticing her goiters and other parts.
I liked the toilet seat reference.
When I die and go to hell, I'll still remember this story.
~ Erik
reply by the author on 21-Aug-2014
|
Better than the original. I bet God's up there scratching his almighty head, saying, "Yeah, that's how I should have done it." He left too much of the nitty gritty eroticism out of the story.
This is probably how it would've been. Guy sees a chick for the first time in human history, he's gonna think she's some kind of freak, until he starts noticing her goiters and other parts.
I liked the toilet seat reference.
When I die and go to hell, I'll still remember this story.
~ Erik
Comment Written 20-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 21-Aug-2014
-
Thanks, Erik. Adam and Eve are such easy targets.
When you die, look me up in Hell. We'll roast wienies.
Thanks, Cap'n.
Peace, Lee
Comment from dennis0530
It's a wonder and mind wanders. Two unclothed beings, one with a tab and the other a slot. Without a proper language for instruction, how was the "inserting" to be done? But just like any Adam gifted with a new gadget, a "hands on" will do. Otherwise, an experimental "manual" will have to be resorted to.
And - how was Adam to know that tweaking "the goiter" could be fun. Maybe next time he will admit they are edible but cannot be swallowed.
reply by the author on 21-Aug-2014
|
It's a wonder and mind wanders. Two unclothed beings, one with a tab and the other a slot. Without a proper language for instruction, how was the "inserting" to be done? But just like any Adam gifted with a new gadget, a "hands on" will do. Otherwise, an experimental "manual" will have to be resorted to.
And - how was Adam to know that tweaking "the goiter" could be fun. Maybe next time he will admit they are edible but cannot be swallowed.
Comment Written 20-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 21-Aug-2014
-
Thank you, dennis. Adam and Eve are easy targets. I'm delighted you enjoyed. Peace, Lee
Comment from Spitfire
This is a holy hoot. Pun intended. The intrusion of language or sounds unknown to Adam is skillfully done. Love the treatment of genitals:the geezer didn't give you much to work with on either floor, did he?"
And sex: Doesn't 'insert Tab A into Slot E' mean anything to you?
Mark Twain would approve.
reply by the author on 23-Aug-2014
 |
This is a holy hoot. Pun intended. The intrusion of language or sounds unknown to Adam is skillfully done. Love the treatment of genitals:the geezer didn't give you much to work with on either floor, did he?"
And sex: Doesn't 'insert Tab A into Slot E' mean anything to you?
Mark Twain would approve.
Comment Written 19-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 23-Aug-2014
-
Thank you, Shari. I read Twain's Letters From The Earth four decades ago, it's still inspiring me. I much appreciate the galaxy. Peace, Lee
Comment from pafaust
Another hilarious story. I love the imagery of them lighting upon words and then wondering what they mean. I also believe that this is the first time I've seen "hummana" in writing. Good job! I also liked the many nicknames that Eve used for Adam.
reply by the author on 23-Aug-2014
|
Another hilarious story. I love the imagery of them lighting upon words and then wondering what they mean. I also believe that this is the first time I've seen "hummana" in writing. Good job! I also liked the many nicknames that Eve used for Adam.
Comment Written 19-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 23-Aug-2014
-
Thanks so much, pafaust. I'm delighted you enjoyed. Peace, Lee
Comment from IndianaIrish
OMG ... Oh My Geezer! How I enjoyed every word of this Old Testicle story, hw. Your clever and original talent is such a pleasure to read. Of course Adam was a duh walking around eating and scratching, but I was surprised he didn't play fart games and laughed at his body music. And why did I have reoccurring images of monkeys and apes laughing in the trees at him? I loved Eve and her taking Adam by the weather vane and leading him to the real honest-to-geezer paradise. Didn't you write another A and E story? I'd love to read your take on some other booble tales.
Oh, and I could also see the devil snake with a Mickey D's uniform and visor in the apple tree buffing up some to go apples.
Smiles,
Indy : )
reply by the author on 19-Aug-2014
|
OMG ... Oh My Geezer! How I enjoyed every word of this Old Testicle story, hw. Your clever and original talent is such a pleasure to read. Of course Adam was a duh walking around eating and scratching, but I was surprised he didn't play fart games and laughed at his body music. And why did I have reoccurring images of monkeys and apes laughing in the trees at him? I loved Eve and her taking Adam by the weather vane and leading him to the real honest-to-geezer paradise. Didn't you write another A and E story? I'd love to read your take on some other booble tales.
Oh, and I could also see the devil snake with a Mickey D's uniform and visor in the apple tree buffing up some to go apples.
Smiles,
Indy : )
Comment Written 19-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 19-Aug-2014
-
Thank you, Indy. Yes, I've written about Adam and Eve a couple of times. The always seem worth a laugh to me. Old Testicle story--that's good. Wish I'd have thought of it. Mickey D as the serpent--that's good, too. Maybe Eve bit into one of those fried apple pies McDonald's sells.
Thank you again, Indy. Glad you enjoyed. Write something!
Peace, Lee
Comment from LIJ Red
Ya mean the one about Lilith who wanted to get on top and got turned into the demonette of nights past for not showing proper respect? Cute yarn, this.
reply by the author on 19-Aug-2014
|
Ya mean the one about Lilith who wanted to get on top and got turned into the demonette of nights past for not showing proper respect? Cute yarn, this.
Comment Written 18-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 19-Aug-2014
-
Thank you, LIJ Red. Hey, not many people remember Lilith's story. I wrote a poem about she, Adam and Eve several years ago.
So glad you enjoyed. Peace, Lee
