A Funny Face
rhyming quatrains in 8/6/8/6158 total reviews
Comment from Treischel
A delightful listing of several things that make a day go awry so colorfully described in this enchanting verse. Loved the imagery like: treats going splat, and stones that will not skip. The alliteration of funny faces, cakes fall flat, bug bites, peas on plates, make mistakes, carts crash, dreams dash. In line rhyming adds depth to the abcb rhymng. Onomatopoeia of pop and splat and plop. Great string of T sound assonance in: it takes to turn. Very nice.
reply by the author on 11-Aug-2014
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A delightful listing of several things that make a day go awry so colorfully described in this enchanting verse. Loved the imagery like: treats going splat, and stones that will not skip. The alliteration of funny faces, cakes fall flat, bug bites, peas on plates, make mistakes, carts crash, dreams dash. In line rhyming adds depth to the abcb rhymng. Onomatopoeia of pop and splat and plop. Great string of T sound assonance in: it takes to turn. Very nice.
Comment Written 11-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 11-Aug-2014
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thanks so much, Treischel, for your observant review :-) Brooke
Comment from Deniz22
Selfies worth watching, at last! How cute are they? Love your poem also and as always the wonderful economy of dove-tailed words. Dennis
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2014
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Selfies worth watching, at last! How cute are they? Love your poem also and as always the wonderful economy of dove-tailed words. Dennis
Comment Written 10-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2014
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Thanks so very much, Dennis, for your generous response to my poem and to Miranda's selfies :-) Brooke
Comment from Tatarka2
This is another poem I wish I could have given our friends' little granddaughter. It's so perfect to be read to little ones, especially with the perfect rhyme, and the pictures enhance the poem so beautifully. Very well done.
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2014
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This is another poem I wish I could have given our friends' little granddaughter. It's so perfect to be read to little ones, especially with the perfect rhyme, and the pictures enhance the poem so beautifully. Very well done.
Comment Written 10-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2014
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Thank you so much, my encouraging friend :-) Brooke
Comment from Patrick G Cox
Hi Brooke,
I loved this one, it doesn't take much to turn tears to smiles if we make the effort. Nicely said in this poem.
Our village has just been hit by a 'mini-tornado'. We have tiles off our roof and other houses are damaged as well. Lot's of trees down all around, but no injuries, praise the Lord.
Patrick
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2014
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Hi Brooke,
I loved this one, it doesn't take much to turn tears to smiles if we make the effort. Nicely said in this poem.
Our village has just been hit by a 'mini-tornado'. We have tiles off our roof and other houses are damaged as well. Lot's of trees down all around, but no injuries, praise the Lord.
Patrick
Comment Written 10-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2014
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Patrick, thank you so much :-) Brooke
Comment from rosehill (Wendy)
Another delight from your busy brain. I love all the choices you made of things that can go wrong. Most are gentle disappointments (well, the dashed dreams can be a bit harsh on the psyche) and your comment on funny faces is so true as a fix for life's little oops list, particularly when someone is there to make them with you. - Wendy
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2014
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Another delight from your busy brain. I love all the choices you made of things that can go wrong. Most are gentle disappointments (well, the dashed dreams can be a bit harsh on the psyche) and your comment on funny faces is so true as a fix for life's little oops list, particularly when someone is there to make them with you. - Wendy
Comment Written 10-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2014
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Wendy, thank you so very much :-) It is great to hear from you. Brooke
Comment from Dutchie
Such a joy to read this one, Brooke. Things don't always go as expected, especially in a child's life. A funny face helps..
You forget all those things which went wrong.
The poem is great, nice flow and rhythm. And the rhyme so unforced. Loved it!! Fia
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2014
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Such a joy to read this one, Brooke. Things don't always go as expected, especially in a child's life. A funny face helps..
You forget all those things which went wrong.
The poem is great, nice flow and rhythm. And the rhyme so unforced. Loved it!! Fia
Comment Written 10-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2014
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Fia, thank you so much for your thoughtful review :-) Brooke
Comment from flylikeaneagle
adewpearl:
Excellent message and wonderful selfies. Kids like to see photos of themselves. My daughters are in high school and college and still send photos to friends. Wait until Sawyer gets into computers and cell phones! What fun times with mom to share with us all on FS. I like your images of Sawyer's day. Mine is different...water heater went out and we had cold showers for two days. Our tenant lost his job and turned to alcohol and drugs. Looking forward to a family vacation, school starting and watching Annie cheer. Our husky puppy with blue eyes is growing and loves attention. Monica is now a senior in college at age 20. Maybe, now, I can make more creative memory books when the girls are both in school. I am trusting in the Lord and learning how to be a creative writer. Jumping hurdles.
I know that I make mistakes but I keep trying.
Thank you Brooke.
flylikeaneagle
Soli deo Gloria.
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2014
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adewpearl:
Excellent message and wonderful selfies. Kids like to see photos of themselves. My daughters are in high school and college and still send photos to friends. Wait until Sawyer gets into computers and cell phones! What fun times with mom to share with us all on FS. I like your images of Sawyer's day. Mine is different...water heater went out and we had cold showers for two days. Our tenant lost his job and turned to alcohol and drugs. Looking forward to a family vacation, school starting and watching Annie cheer. Our husky puppy with blue eyes is growing and loves attention. Monica is now a senior in college at age 20. Maybe, now, I can make more creative memory books when the girls are both in school. I am trusting in the Lord and learning how to be a creative writer. Jumping hurdles.
I know that I make mistakes but I keep trying.
Thank you Brooke.
flylikeaneagle
Soli deo Gloria.
Comment Written 10-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2014
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Thank you so much, Gloria - he already loves cell phones and computers, though at 27 months he has to content himself with his dad's old phone and a "toy" computer. You sure have on busy family life! I appreciate your generous sixth star :-) Brooke
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Brooke: We keep busy. Blessed to be a blessing, focusing on Jesus and writing on FS. I need to start a scrapbook for my writings now. Thanks for your terrific poems.
flylikeaneagle
Nancy
Comment from mfowler
I have to admit, the 'funny face' solution worked for me as Dad in so many instances with my kids. Not so much, now that they're in their 30's, but when it mattered, it was a great leveller. I think that's what's so appealing here, Brooke. In beautifully composed stanzas, you've listed a range of disasters that call for the funny face solution. My favourite here is:
When cakes fall flat and treats go splat
and kites are caught by trees,
when bubbles pop and stones go plop
and will not skip with ease
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2014
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I have to admit, the 'funny face' solution worked for me as Dad in so many instances with my kids. Not so much, now that they're in their 30's, but when it mattered, it was a great leveller. I think that's what's so appealing here, Brooke. In beautifully composed stanzas, you've listed a range of disasters that call for the funny face solution. My favourite here is:
When cakes fall flat and treats go splat
and kites are caught by trees,
when bubbles pop and stones go plop
and will not skip with ease
Comment Written 10-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2014
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mfowler, yeah, I doubt my son would fall for a funny face if he, at 35, has had a bad day, but I think a hug from me would still help. LOL Thanks so much :-) Brooke
Comment from michaelcahill
Thank you! I don't even know what order this is in. Hahaha. I'm so buried. I knew I just had to run and find one of yours. This is the big smile that I needed. You make this seem so easy. It just bounces a long like the greatest fun. Wonderful. You should see some of us trying to write something like this. Smiles and laughter, yes. But, not the same thing!!! mikey
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2014
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Thank you! I don't even know what order this is in. Hahaha. I'm so buried. I knew I just had to run and find one of yours. This is the big smile that I needed. You make this seem so easy. It just bounces a long like the greatest fun. Wonderful. You should see some of us trying to write something like this. Smiles and laughter, yes. But, not the same thing!!! mikey
Comment Written 10-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2014
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Thank you so much, Mikey :-) Hope you unbury yourself before you suffocate, my friend :-) Brooke
Comment from DALLAS01
A great series of funny face. Kind of hinges on the ability to laugh at ones self. I like the inner line rhyme.
When cakes fall flat and treats go splat
and kites are caught by trees,
when bubbles pop and stones go plop
and will not skip with ease
And I am sure even kids, have these kinds of days.
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2014
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A great series of funny face. Kind of hinges on the ability to laugh at ones self. I like the inner line rhyme.
When cakes fall flat and treats go splat
and kites are caught by trees,
when bubbles pop and stones go plop
and will not skip with ease
And I am sure even kids, have these kinds of days.
Comment Written 09-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2014
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Dallas, thank you so very much :-) Yep, lots of things can go wrong in a little kid's day! Brooke
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:.)
