Reviews from

Along the Jericho Road

Viewing comments for Chapter 63 "Witko Moon"
Murder Mystery

37 total reviews 
Comment from AprilShower
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted


This is another well written chapter, Bev. I would give you another six, but you already have six stars. I want to save some of the ones I have. I'm going to continue reading.

April

 Comment Written 31-Aug-2014


reply by the author on 31-Aug-2014
    Thanks so much, April. I really appreciate your stopping by to read and review so kindly. :) Bev
Comment from Dean Kuch
Excellent
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It would seem to be that Aaron would listen to the voices of caution and reason, and re-holster his weapon. I mean, c'mon, it's two against one here. You can't really fault him for being careful, however. Not after what he'd just witnessed.

You also can't help but feel a little bit sorry for Matthew and incessant quest to reach and kill Edward Pearce, especially after what happened to Matthew's father. However, no matter how noble one's intentions are, we as a society cannot tolerate vigilante style justice. Jana is more than aware of that fact.

Looks as if Jana, Father Brian and Rick have Matthew and Aaron over a bit of a barrel here, what with commandeering their car and everything.

But Rick, with fifty-thousand dollars to lose hanging over his head, agrees to make up a story so that Aaron and Matthew can take his car, and continue their pursuit. Jana is beginning to suspect Rick of lying, as his story about sending in the department's team task force just didn't wash with her.

Is Rick the department's traitor?

Well shall soon see, and so will Jana.

Excellently well told, as always, Bev!


 Comment Written 13-Jun-2014


reply by the author on 13-Jun-2014
    Dean, thank you so much for the very encouraging review along with your excellent insights! It's always a treat to hear from one of my favorite writers. Thanks for the time and support.

    Warm regards, Bev
reply by Dean Kuch on 13-Jun-2014
    You're always welcome, Bev. You know that. I'm envious, it is such a well written, perfectly paced story. It's no wonder it had won book of the month countless times.

    Just keep up the great work. But, I'm sure you will!

    ~DK~
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2014
    Dean, thank you again for your encouragement! Means a lot to me, my friend.

    :) Bev
reply by Dean Kuch on 14-Jun-2014
    As yours does to me, Bev...

    ~DK~
Comment from Sonaleeka
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Awesome Writing.I am glad that I got a
opportunity
to read this .Very beautifully crafted.Have a nice day.
God bless! Keep writing.

 Comment Written 13-Jun-2014


reply by the author on 13-Jun-2014
    What a delightful review. Thank you so much Sonaleeka. It was very kind of your to take time to read my chapter and offer such encouragement!

    Warmest regards, Bev
Comment from Joan E.
Excellent
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The plot thickens! Your dialog is very real and well paced. I enjoyed your comparison to the "twitch of a cat's whisker" as well. The artwork you selected reinforced the mystical mood also. Cheers- Joan

 Comment Written 13-Jun-2014


reply by the author on 13-Jun-2014
    Thanks so much, my friend, for this generous and very supportive review. It's always good to hear what works. One reader thought my simile was a bit much. But I decided to keep it and am glad you liked it too! Have a great weekend, Joan!

    Hugs, Bev
reply by Joan E. on 13-Jun-2014
    I always relish the poetry devices you include in your storytelling. Happy weekend to you as well- Joan
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2014
    Thanks, Joan. There are purists that really don't like that, but I am also an occasional poet. I like to see them in other people's writing as well. XX Bev
Comment from rama devi
Excellent
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A very exciting chapter-riveting! Well paced for the action scene and tension-filled interactions. Reading it, I was right there and fully drawn in, in spite of not having read the whole book (YET)!!


Just a few tiny suggestions to note:

*Do I want to wait around for help to arrive and risk losing my chance to get to that bastard(,) Pearce?

*"Do you feel any pain?" Jana asked the priest

"I'm not hurt. The Lord has seen to it we're safe. Don't you see it's a sign?"

*Isn't that what you're doing out here on the Reservation, Mr. Buel -- trying to get to Edward Pearce first.(?)"

* He watched Jana stop in front of the Mexican cop(,) who still had a solid grip on his employee.

The POV switch from Matthew to Jana is smooth and lucid. Good deep POVs, too. Excellent character and plot development.

Bravo

Love,
rd


 Comment Written 12-Jun-2014


reply by the author on 12-Jun-2014
    Oh, I'm so glad to know the POV worked in this chapter, rd. I think, with your help, I may actually be getting a handle on it. And the other changes are forthcoming. Thanks you much, Recognized Writer of the month, for all your support and encouragement. Love, Bev
reply by rama devi on 12-Jun-2014
    Thanks, sweet Bev, for your lovely comments, support and graciousness! Hugs and Love, rd
reply by the author on 13-Jun-2014
    You're most welcome, rd. Always great to encourage such a talented writer!! xx Bev
reply by rama devi on 14-Jun-2014
    Aw, thanks! :-))) Love, rd
Comment from Aussie
Excellent
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Ooh, I like the snake's eye? Best descriptions - She pressed a fist against her lower spine - Strange, the airbags didn't deploy (makes the reader stop and think.)His fists were balled and his neck ridged (hairs on reader's neck stand up, waiting. Loads of action and the reader is waiting for an answer to Are you the Department's traitor? Six shiny stars I wish I had to give. Just look up tonite. LOL.

 Comment Written 12-Jun-2014


reply by the author on 12-Jun-2014
    Yeah, I lot that picture, too, Kay. That artist has an interesting portfolio.

    You've been such a faithful supporter, and I very much appreciate your wish for a six. But, truly, your insights are even more valuable. Thanks so much, my friend. Big Hug, Bev
Comment from Selina Stambi
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

My dear Bev,

The final line made my heart jerk with anxiety and suspicion ... and now I have to wait to find out!

Another fabulous chapter, my friend. Lots of drama and tension. It just keeps coming. The pace never flags or stumbles. Wonderfully well done!

Hugs and love,

xxx

Sonali


He was about to ask (about) her condition

The Lord has seen to it ( ...) we're safe .. think you might need a 'that' heere

 Comment Written 11-Jun-2014


reply by the author on 12-Jun-2014
    Hello, my dear Sonali. Thank you so much for this very encouraging and generous review. As always, I appreciate your sharp eye for making things flow better! Glad you're still enjoying the novel. I'm cooking up a couple more intense chapters before bringing this project to a close. Your support helps make that process smoother for me.

    Love,

    Bev
Comment from Rosalyne
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Hi, Bev.
I'm so sorry for not getting to this sooner. Your chapter is fabulous as is the entire book! Your dialogue and visuals are excellent, placing me at the scene. I could feel the tension and see Matthew's hesitation refusing to share the miracle he witnessed. You wrapped up the chapter perfectly, from Rick's betrayal to Jana's questioning intuitive thoughts. Bravo my friend! You have an amazing book!
Bye
Hugs
Rosalyne :)

 Comment Written 11-Jun-2014


reply by the author on 11-Jun-2014
    Rosalyne, so good to hear from you. Thank you for this so very generous review. I'm honored and thrilled that you enjoyed the chapter. You're always so faithful, and I really appreciate that.

    Hugs, Bev
Comment from Roxanna Andrews
Excellent
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Interesting, exciting, well written, this would make a really good movie. Looks like it is getting close to the end, hope it lasts a while longer, I always hate it when a good book comes to an end.

 Comment Written 11-Jun-2014


reply by the author on 11-Jun-2014
    Hi, Roxanna. Thank you so much for this great review. I'm trying to pull the threads together to bring it to a close. It's touching for me to know you're still enjoying reading it.

    Hugs, Bev
Comment from Connie C
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Once again, Bev, you illustrate your excellent use of dialogue to move the story along. I try each time to find SPAG errors but never see any, so you are doing very well in that regard, my friend. Each chapter leaves me wanting to read more, and that's a good sign.
Hugs,
Connie

 Comment Written 11-Jun-2014


reply by the author on 11-Jun-2014
    Thank you so much, Connie. I'm glad you're looking out for any spag issues. Sometimes, I miss the dumbest things! And thanks, as always, for your support, generosity and encouragement.

    Hugs, Bev