Comment from gazzagodbod

Excellent

wow mr Flump what a cracker love the descriptive way you write could see the girl in the green dress so clearly and fabulous story to the end well done gazza

 Comment Written 05-Oct-2012

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reply by the author on 07-Oct-2012

Thanks, Gazza - I'm really glad you liked it :-)

Mike

Comment from Auroraboreal800

Excellent

Vampire story are not my favorite ones, but this "Eternal Flames" is a very good one! With a great descriptions used throughout, from a wonderful imagery. Very well written! Very good job Fleed!!

 Comment Written 05-Oct-2012

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reply by the author on 07-Oct-2012

Thanks so much, Aurora - what a great review :-)

Mike

Comment from bbcullen1988

Excellent

I really like this story!! I really felt like I was in the character's shoes throughout the story. I couldn't pinpoint a single thing I didn't like out of the story. You have a real talent and I look forward to reading more of your material. Thank you for sharing.

 Comment Written 05-Oct-2012

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reply by the author on 07-Oct-2012

Thank you, BBC. I really appreciate it.

Mike

Comment from The Winter Bard

Excellent

That was terrific! An awesome little horror story with a fine twist. I love the characters, their easy interaction and personalities. You write excellent dialogue.

Well done :)

 Comment Written 04-Oct-2012

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reply by the author on 07-Oct-2012

Thank you, Ais. I used to have real trouble with dialogue, so I spent a while writing nothing but scripts. It was painful, but it soon sort me out!

Mike

Comment from Mara del Mar

Excellent

This is a great vampire story, with vivid descriptions make that reader visualizes each scene. Your dialogue is very good, and the characters are believable and move with naturality on the plot action. Good luck in the contest.

 Comment Written 04-Oct-2012

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reply by the author on 07-Oct-2012

Thanks so much for the great review, Mara :-)

Mike

Comment from Writingfundimension

Excellent

I'm glad I took time to read this. A very refreshing take on a vampire story. You built the horror steadily and kept me on my toes with your plot shifts. Great descriptions used throughout. Good luck with this excellent entry!

Regards, Bev

 Comment Written 04-Oct-2012

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reply by the author on 07-Oct-2012

Thanks, WFD :-)

I do like to avoid the 'usual' s I'm glad you liked the twists in this one.

Mike

reply by Writingfundimension on 07-Oct-2012

You're very welcome, Mike.

Comment from bossladyone

Excellent

This was well written. It was mysterious and exciting. I liked it a lot. I hope to read more of this story and see what he does next. Thank you for sharing

 Comment Written 04-Oct-2012

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reply by the author on 07-Oct-2012

Thanks, boss lady :-)

I enjoyed writing this, so I'm glad the read is good.

Mike

Comment from rushingwater

Excellent

Wow what an interesting story... and twisted a few times but none like the one at the end. I did not see that coming. You painted great images with your descriptions and put me right into the scene with you. Nicely done.

 Comment Written 04-Oct-2012

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reply by the author on 07-Oct-2012

Thanks so much, RW. I'm glad the twist worked for you!

Mike

Comment from TDLRasmar

Excellent

This was very nice. I really enjoyed reading this one. Each sentence coming out like darts. You painted some very nice images the way you described what was going on. Nice little twist at the end. Also nice the way you tied the beginning to the end. Very nicely done.

 Comment Written 04-Oct-2012

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reply by the author on 07-Oct-2012

Thanks for the great review, tdl :-)

I'm thrilled you enjoyed the read.

Mike

Comment from Angels27

Excellent

Hey Fleedleflump....a very different form of vampire story. It is completely different from the usual predictable cliched description. The narrative is gripping, and the description paints a vivid picture. All the best in the contest.

 Comment Written 04-Oct-2012

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reply by the author on 07-Oct-2012

Thanks so much, Angels :-)

I was determined to be a bit different, so I'm really glad that came through in the story.

Mike