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17 total reviews
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Comment by | 2009-2012 Poet Of The Year | | | Premier Author | | | Premier Reader | | | Poet Rating
 Rank: 1 | Author Rating For Short Works
 | Author Rating For Novels
| Review Stars
Rank: 1 | | | |
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This is brilliant, Sally - great flow/cadence, strong rhymes, wonderful use of alliteration, fanciful personification - add that all together and this is simply delightful :-)
Perfection in rhyme, my friend :-) Brooke
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Comment Written 07-Feb-2012 |
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reply by the author on 08-Feb-2012
Wow, thank you so much Brooke! I hgad a bit of a struggle with this one. Mind you, everything is a struggle, writing wise at the moment! I really appreciate your generous stars, and am SO glad you liked it. I've had some great reviews on this from people whose opinion I respect greatly, so very much appreciated!
Best wishes
Sally
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Comment by | | Premier Author | | | | | Poet Rating
Rank: 86 | Author Rating For Short Works
| Review Stars
 Rank: 118 | | | |
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LOL!
Love this one! So whimsical and witty with a perfect delivery from the dot's POV...perfect poem for children. Bouncy and fun!
enjoyed the premise of the pice so well defined in opening line (pun intended)
"If I could walk,"
declared a dot,
"I might become a line."
Love the fluid free verse style with random rhyme and near-rhyme assonance, and alliteration and consonance too...
As for the devices and clever word chocies, these stanzas stand out as my favorite
He wiggled,
squiggled,
trailed through ink,
he squeezed through scribbles,
curled in kinks.
He crawled
past scrawls
and messy jots,
round splats
and crosses,
splodges, blots.
And as for content and satisfaction in the message, these are my favorites:
"This page
has too much space,"
puffed dot.
'Til, in a daze,
he saw his line
had ended
without trace.
So thankful dot
drew to a stop
back where his line began -
and nothing
felt more
comfy than
his own
small
cosy
spot
Pitch perfect deep message delivered in light style,
Bravo, dear Sally...a rare six for you!
Love, rd
PS Nice presentation, too
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Comment Written 06-Feb-2012 |
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reply by the author on 07-Feb-2012
Oh, rd, how very generous of you! I'm so glad you liked it. I actually spent ages over this - couldn't believe what hard work I made of it - so all the more appreciative of this lovely review and the glowing stars. I still feel that writing of this kind is second rate to some of the beautiful sonnets and other forms to be found, so your reassurance is much appreciated.
A big hug to you
Sal x
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reply by rama devi on 07-Feb-2012
I'd give six stars to Dr. Suess as well! And if he wrote for children in sonnet form, I'd only give a three. hee hee. It all depends on genre!
love, rd
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Comment by| 2012 Short Works Writer Of The Year | | | Premier Author | | | Premier Reader | | | Review Stars
Rank: 458 | | | |
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Comment by | | Premier Author | | | Semper Fi | | | Poet Rating
| Author Rating For Short Works
Rank: 57 | Author Rating For Novels
| Review Stars
Rank: 325 | | | |
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Comment by | | Inspiration | | | is all around us | | | Poet Rating
Rank: 284 | Author Rating For Short Works
Rank: 22 | Author Rating For Novels
Rank: 22 | Review Stars
Rank: 130 | | | |
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Comment by | | Premier Author | | | | | Poet Rating
Rank: 444 | Author Rating For Short Works
Rank: 189 | Author Rating For Novels
Rank: 24 | Review Stars
Rank: 161 | | | |
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Comment by| 2008, 2011 and 2012 Novelist Of The Year | | | Premier Author | | | | | Poet Rating
Rank: 74 | Author Rating For Short Works
Rank: 71 | Author Rating For Novels
Rank: 1 | Review Stars
Rank: 48 | | | |
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Comment by | | Premier Author | | | | | Poet Rating
Rank: 69  (+2) | Author Rating For Short Works
Rank: 167 | Review Stars
Rank: 246 | | | |
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