Background: Two robbers with a briefcase full of money wait for their partner in a condemned house, inhabited by six female misfits. Three of the gals have helped themselves to some of the money when the briefcase was left unguarded. They fear now that Mickey will discover the loss. In the previous scene Mack and Sarge went grocery shopping, and Loony held a mock therapy session to discover Mickey's background. At the end, he talks her into revealing a secret about Frieda.
LOONY
Go on, Frieda. Tell him why your boyfriend dumped--
FRIEDA
I hate you, Loony!
LOONY
She got drunk at the rehearsal party and did the Dance of the Seven Veils. Showed
ev-er-y thing. Her fiancé was a Baptist preacher. So were some of the guests.
KANDY
The Dance of the Seven Veils! Ooh. Teach me. Teach me.
MICKEY
Yeah, teach her. This I wanna see.
LOONY
It’ll cost a million dollars. Open the briefcase. I'll count it out.
FRIEDA
He doesn’t have a million in there. I doubt there's even a thousand. You never could count past ten, Mickey.
MICKEY
Oh yeah? Well, let me prove I can, Frigid Face.
(He sets case on table. CRYSTAL rushes over, sits opposite him.)
CRYSTAL
Let me read ze palm first. I look at lines. See if you get away with robber plan.
MICKEY
Don’t touch my hand, you carny fraud.
CRYSTAL
I not be fraud. Be good sport. I not even charge.
LOONY (goading)
Bet ya Trixie would do it.
KANDY
Me too. Your sister sounds like a winner.
CRYSTAL
She be smart too.
MICKEY
Okay, okay. Go ahead. Read me.
CRYSTAL (taking his free hand)
Very strange. I see same kind of lines as in Chesty Lambkin palm.
MICKEY
I want nothin’ in common with that stripper.
CRYSTAL
It not be bad thing. She is to travel. And so are you. (a beat) But not necessarily together.
MICKEY
It don’t take a rocket scientist to figure that --
FRIEDA
It doesn’t take –
MICKEY (to CRYSTAL) Of course, I’ll travel. Youse think I’m gonna stick around here with my money?
CRYSTAL
You vill travel around ze world.
MICKEY
On my private jet.
CRYSTAL
No. On hotel boat. Same as Kandy. (a beat) But maybe not ze same one.
MICKEY
I don’t go nowhere on a boat. Hell, I get seasick in a bathtub.
CRYSTAL
Palm do not lie. I wonder how you pay for such travel? I don’t see money in zis hand.
MICKEY
Course not. It’s in the briefcase. I’ll show --
CRYSTAL (holding tight to his hand) Some other time. My powers in full bloom right now.
ELLEN
Me too. I need a sugar fix, or I'll start sweating. Maybe go into a coma. There has to be
something in that kitchen.
FRIEDA
As a matter of fact, there is.
MICKEY
How do you know, Tight Buns?
FRIEDA
Tight Buns? Why, Mickey, you have been checking me out.
MICKEY
I was referrin’ to your brain cells.
CRYSTAL
You want to fight with teacher or find out future?
MICKEY
Why don’t you see no money in my hand? I gots a million dollars.
(He pulls hand away, starts to unlatch case.)
KANDY (rushes over, frantic)
Before you show us the money, I have a confession to make.
(All heads turn in her direction.)
CRYSTAL MICKEY
What! What?
To be continued.
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Author Notes
Dance of the Seven Veils The Princess Salome dances for King Herod in exchange for him giving her anything that she wants. The dance is very sensuous and involves the gradual taking off of seven long veils draping her body. It can be seen on YouTube.
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