Exceptional A late night muse on times long past What Were You in College by bhogg Non-Fiction contest entry

I was at a party recently, drink in hand and a smile on my face. My life is currently split down the middle between North Carolina and Georgia. This party was on the North Carolina side. To my surprise, I met an attractive young lady from my old alma mater, Auburn University, which is located in East Central Alabama. It's not unusual to run into an Auburn graduate in Georgia, but a bit unusual for here. The young lady graduated two years ago and now works in a local bank. She was gushing, excited to meet another alumnus, and as my wife later said, mentally lining me up as a future customer. Within sixty seconds, she commented, "I was a Chi Omega, what were you?" An interesting question indeed, what was I? There's a flaw in my psyche. Often, something serves as a trigger that causes my mind to race, the neurons scream and I can't sleep. Her question to me was that trigger. In bed that night, I couldn't sleep. It's been forty years since I was in college. What was I when there? Well, for one thing, I wasn't hanging around with Greeks. Most of my friends could more accurately be described as geeks. The one common denominator we all shared was a lack of money. Looking back, I do believe that my experience might have been enriched by being a member of a fraternity, but for me, it wasn't in the cards. Sometimes, I wish that I had handled my own children as my father handled me. Each September, when I began a college year, my dad would write me a check for two-thousand dollars. With his left hand on my shoulder, he would look me in the eye, shake my hand and simply say, "Good luck, son." That was a lot of money back in the day, but certainly couldn't cover all the expenses for a year of college. Consequently, I worked each summer and part time during the school year. I graduated on time in 1971. As a graduation present, my parents gave me a tool box, full of simple hand tools. I still have it. I wanted it to be different for my two children. With a divorce, well before they graduated from high school, there was one provision in the divorce proceedings that I had no problem with. That was, I would be totally responsible for their college expenses. To my way of thinking, that was fair. I certainly wanted them to go and would have handled their college regardless. Many of my friends pointed out that I should have structured the settlement to insist that my ex-wife share financial responsibility. I scoffed at the idea, and felt they were wrong. It made no difference to me. Where I missed the boat was with the two kids. I never got them to buy in to their own responsibility. Both went where they wanted to go . My son joined a fraternity, my daughter a sorority, and they always had things paid for and ample pocket money. When I would talk to them, it seemed that they were having a great time. Neither of them graduated. I recognize that college isn't for everyone. Someone recently asked what I thought the most important thing about college was. I thought for a moment and replied, "College puts kids in a relatively safe environment, and allows them four years to grow up. Along the way, they will at least experience a small slice of life." Neither of my two experienced that slice. Both got married too young and not necessarily with the right partners. One has a good job, but one that he hates and is afraid to leave. The other is in a dependency relationship with her spouse and she's afraid to leave. My mind came back to the question, "What were you in college?" I was a hard worker. After almost flunking out after two years, I finally figured out how to balance my student life with my personal one. My last two years were always dean's list. What I learned from college and later on, through graduate school, helped me become a successful business person. Through that, I'm not a wealthy person, but am comfortable with myself and my life. College was good for me. Where I fell short in life was as a father. Recognized

© Copyright 2024. bhogg All rights reserved. bhogg has granted FanStory.com, its affiliates and its syndicates non-exclusive rights to display this work.