(Narrator)
Do you hate spotty butts? Well so does Dr Smoothie, so he scoured the UK for the best Butt Butter ingredients!
(Children's Choir)
Dr Smoothie found a ram
lurking in a field;
he didn't stay,
he ran away,
and the bruise has yet to heal!
CHORUS
Butt Butter, Butt Butter,
butter butts today.
Grease my rear,
and banish fear
of a spotty peach display.
Dr Smoothie ate a butt
sandwich the next day;
a butt butty
with a tea,
and the taste was there to stay.
CHORUS
(Narrator)
His travels complete, Dr Smoothie returned to his lab!
(Children's Choir)
Dr Smoothie took a horn
and a slice of bread,
he made a paste
just to taste,
then he sat back, sighed, and said:
CHORUS
(Narrator)
Dr Smoothie's brilliant Butt Butter; make that butt better today! Available in five, twelve, and twenty-four ounce tubes and, for a limited time only, a five pound bucket!
CHORUS
So come on down and pick up your Butt Butter bargain bucket today!
(Very fast talking voice)
Conditions apply, Dr Smoothie cannot be held accountable for rashes, itches, spots, discharges, or any resulting embarassment. Dr Smoothie butters butts at your own risk. D R Smoothie, a family company.
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Author Notes
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The jingle elements are written to the tune of Jingle Bells.
Having 'set' this in the UK, I briefly considered calling it 'bum butter' or 'arse marg', but decided against it ;-)
Just for clarity; 'butty' is a northern English term for a sandwich.
I hope you enjoy!
Mike
CONTEST RULES:
You have been hired by Baby Products Advertising Agency. Your first assignment is to write a jingle for Dr. Smoothie's Butt Butter an all-natural diaper rash ointment. Here are the rules:
1 - You must write a commercial jingle for Dr. Smoothie's Butt Butter, an all natural diaper rash ointment.
2 - The commercial must be appropriate for television and radio
3 - You must use one of the following tunes for the jingle.
Jingle Bells
The Bear Went Over the Mountain
Itsy Bitsy Spider
Santa Clause is Coming to Town
4 - Must be SPAG free
5 - In Author's notes you must note which tune you have decided to use.
A little information on Dr. Smoothie's Butt Butter: This is an all-natural product guaranteed to rid your loved one of nasty diaper rash. It is hypoallergenic, and perfect for sensitive skin. Is available 5 oz, 12, oz, and 24 oz tubes. Also available in 5 lb buckets. This product is odorless and easy to use.
Dr. Smoothie's Butt Butter makes butts all better.
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