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Margaret watched silken sheets of rain flowing across the horizon as the sun made another attempt to breach the bruised clouds hanging in the sky.
"It's her birthday, you know. I miss her so much. It isn't fair."
She felt the touch on her shoulder as a tear slipped down her cheek. Margaret reached up and squeezed the comforting hand.
"Why not write to her? Wish her a happy birthday," her companion said.
"Write to her? How will that help? She can't read it. She's d. . ."
"I know. Still, it might make you feel better."
Margaret looked up. "You're right. I'll do it."
Jumping up, she hurried to her study and returned, pen and notebook in hand. Sinking into a comfortable chair overlooking the balcony, she curled up and looked out across the sky. "You can see forever from here."
Her friend smiled. "I'll leave you to your letter writing."
Margaret picked up the pen and began to write.
My dearest Louise,
Today is such a special day for both of us. It's your birthday again. I will never forget your first birthday or for that matter, the day you were born. I held you in my arms and stared into those deep blue eyes of yours, filled with trust and knowing. You searched my face like a tiny scanning machine, as though you were making sure you would never forget a single feature. I must have looked so scared. You were my first-born child and I didn't feel any of the confidence you seemed to have for the journey before us.
Yet we made it, didn't we?
We fought often during those teenage years as you struggled to find your own way in life. I wanted to stop you from taking some roads but all I could do was wave goodbye as you drove away. I called out "I love you," but I don't know if you heard me.
I watched you grow into a lovely young woman with such different dreams and ideas than I'd imagined. Sometimes we would still disagree, but I hope you know how proud I was of your accomplishments. I loved you so much. I thought we had so much time left to spend together.
Without warning we were torn apart and the finality of death only sinks in more with each passing season.
How I long to pick up a phone and call you for your birthday. To hear your voice just once more. I miss you so much. I know one day I will see you again and it will be the most wonderful and joyous occasion.
I hope you are having a wonderful time in that beautiful place. I will always love you. Happy birthday, sweetheart.
All my love,
Mama
Margaret signed her name and walked out onto the balcony. Holding the letter tight, she wept. Three of her tears stained the paper. "I love you," she whispered as she held the letter over the edge and let go. She watched it fall until it faded from sight.
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Louise felt the splash of three tiny drops on her face and looked up, squinting in the sun. "Where did they come from?"
The storm's fury was long spent. White wisps of cotton hung in a robin's egg sky and a whitewashed moon hung on the horizon over the red barn where she'd just finished chores.
"Come on, Mom! Daddy and I have finished making the cake for your birthday," a child's voice called out across the yard.
"Okay, honey. I'll be right there," Louise replied. Raising her hand, she touched the mist on her cheeks, looked up once more and talked to the sky.
"I miss you so much on my birthday, Mama. Even after all these years. I didn't even get a chance to say goodbye before you died. Now I'm down here and you're up there having a wonderful time in heaven. I love you, Mama." Misty-eyed, she blew a kiss into the air, making a mental note to go place flowers on her mother, Margaret's grave later that day.
The wind caressed her face as she wiped her eyes and headed to the house to join her family. Then it twisted and headed up into the sky once more like a messenger on a mission.
Author Notes
It is my birthday today and I miss my mama. The idea of this story came to me while I was milking goats this morning. I hope you enjoyed it, and if you are missing your mama too, or your child, I hope it brings you comfort.
Hugs,
Janilou
PS My apologies for any errors. I will correct any you find after chores tonight!
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