There are men who have raised children believing them to be their own progeny and never knowing the truth that the children in reality were carrying someone else's genes. Even today, in many old cultures, a husband of a newlywed woman and his parents, point finger at the wife and label her as infertile, when within the first year or two of consummation of their marriage, the woman fails to conceive and deliver a child. In the most cases, the problem of infertility often lies with their husbands.

Under the circumstance, the husband, supported by his family, not only refuses even to consider the possibility that he could be infertile but resorts to violence against her if she suggests a medical check up. In many such cases, those unfortunate women are abandoned and in the situations like that, the risk of a social stigma stamped on one daughter is automatically transferred to her unmarried sisters and they all appear genetically infertile. Parents, out of such fears shut their door on the woman in distress. Then committing suicide becomes an attractive way out or else they land up in the brothels.
The smart ones avoid that blot on their anatomy and find a suitable opportunity to get pregnant by any safely available means and life takes its normal course with all happiness prevailing in the families.

In Miriam's case, her opting for the selective breeding was not because of anatomical deficiency in Frank. Perhaps, her Hindu ancestry and its cast and class based selection system of choosing a mate, remained intact in her family's psyche, even after her great grandfather's conversion to Roman Catholic religion. Maybe, she came under the influence of the upper crust of Spanish-Portuguese society's class system.

For first five adolescent years of her life, Marian lived with her parents as they moved to Spain in early-1930s. Her dad finished medical school in Bombay and went to finish residency education in Europe. Her exposure to elite segment of the society, especially, around the church officials, in Spain, definitely influenced her thinking about the importance of have a good family bloodline to conceive superior children. Unfortunately, her dad innocently got mixed up with the Republican side of the Spanish Civil War which broke out in 1936. He treated few wounded rebel soldiers and they, out of gratitude, declared him as a hero. Promptly the fascist Franco's police arrested him. They tortured, and released him after demanding that he must show loyalty to the General's cause by joining their medical corps.
In the prison, he witnessed the horrific treatment of prisoners. After release, fearing the Generalissimo Franco's wrath, Dr. De Costa escaped with his family to Lisbon and returned to Goa by 1938.

Those events affected the family in such a profound way that their fortune and prestige began to decline. Dr. De Costa could not get over the episodes of human tragedies he witnessed and to some extent personally experienced in the prison. The Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome (PTSD), developed since then, led to his excessive consumption of alcohol. As if that was not enough to impact their lives, her mother's illness began to take toll of her health. While escaping from Spain, they had taken a fishing trawler to reach Lisbon and she had picked up infection of lungs. These events resulted in the isolation of her family.
I
By the time Miriam became a debutante, her grandfather's estate had depleted, Dr. De Costa stopped practicing of medicine and mother's illness forced them to shift to Bombay. However, Miriam remained in Goa, completing her schooling. The major change in her life and the absence of gaiety and splendor she had experienced during her stay in Europe had subconsciously influenced her thinking. She began to loath her father as she witnessed his diminishing prestige with the church first and then within the community of Goan elites. She also disliked the poor Catholics around her. Without knowing anything about their lives, she formed an opinion that they all were low-life scum similar to the 'Negroes', as they were referred to, from the Portuguese African Colonies.

What ever happened to her parents, she did not allow that to affect her own dreams and instead of accepting the situation as irreversible, she decided to find a way to get out of it.
"I will not die in poverty and will return to Europe," She resolutely told her image as she stood admiring her own naked body in the mirror. She was sixteen then and life experiences had already matured her beyond her years. An opportunity soon came her way.

The announcement of the 'Governor's Ball' of 1946 and a Beauty Queen competition posted in the Church's notice board, gave her the vision of changing the course of her life. Times were hard, WW II was raging and young men were shipped off to various training centers. Only the sons of influential and wealthy families remained in the land. Mostly the men of past military service age with the aristocratic lineage remained.

Miriam's pragmatic mind had set her priorities and romance described in the European fiction, took secondary place. She knew her beauty inherited from her former high cast Brhaminical ancestors and the personality developed by her interlude with the Spain's aristocracy, would attract the attention of wealthy and influential men-A certain passage out of the malaise the destiny had dished out to her family.

She went about fixing the things in her home. Found a beautiful gown made in Paris that her mother had worn a couple of time in similar occasions. She found a skilled seamstress and made changes to fit it to her well-developed body, taking leave of the modesty and pushing her ample breast up. A sure shot thing to get the older, European men to clean their monocles and peer into her curtsying frame. She had observed that when she was growing up in Spanish society.

Well, things just happened as she thought they would except, she ran into the racial barrier. Overseas experiences were different. There, Dr. De Costa and his families were a novelty. They looked European with the service with colonial administration. He was wealthy and family attended the church events regularly. Living in Goa was a different story. Their family history and the decline of Dr. De Costa's health and fortune, was widely known in the community. Finding an escort for the Governor's Ball became a problem for her.

None of the European stock she met in the church paid attention to her obvious efforts to be noticed. They were polite but uppity in their mannerism towards the colonist. Crust fallen and on the verge of accepting the fate accompli, she began her retreat when she heard the voice of Mr. Mendez.

"Do you want to go to 'The Ball?"

She looked up and saw Mr. Mendez standing there with his son Frank behind him.
She recognized him at once. He was her dad's only friend who regularly visited him and brought the essentials from his Wadi (farm) for the family. She whispered in a defeated voice.

"Yes Mr. Mendez, but no one has asked me yet. Since Dad's illness it's been..."

Mr. Mendez interrupted her and said,
"Don't torture yourself dear; I know all about it."
Then he turned towards his son and asked him to step forward, which he reluctantly did.

"This is my son, Frank; he will take you to the Governor's Ball." Sr. Mendez spoke with authority as if to let his son know he meant it.

Miriam threw a glance at her prospective escort and at once noticed his gold couplings and chain with a Crucifix dangling bellow. His suit had the stamp of Manchester wool. Young man was very handsome in a sexual context. She saw the opportunity in him.

Frustrated Mr. Mendez had set his eyes on Miriam a long time ago. He was in his early forties and a widower. He had seen her growing up to be a perfect mistress, an estate owner to the hilt. The age difference between them was substantial, but it was neither unusual, nor unheard of. Many young women were married off to the widowers with wealth and comforts. Many accepted that life willingly over the miseries of poverty that was assured to them if they married someone poor, but of their age.

The demand for dowry was always the problem for young women. Well-settled and educated families demanded enormous amounts from the parents of young women. Miriam's two approaches to marry by the arrangement, had failed because of this very reason. Men arriving from India to see her had departed after seeing the state of affairs at the De Costa mansion. The dilapidated building and unkempt conditions of gardens in the front, gave them the glimpses of poverty residing at the hearth. Without the courtesy meeting or negotiations, they had departed home. Those episodes had made a deep scar in Miriam's psyche and her resolve to bring back her grandfather's wealth and prestige became stronger. With the entrance to the governor's ballroom opened to her, she began her plans.

Marrying the Sr. Mendez she knew was well within her grasp. All she had to do was to drop a hint. For now, a key to reaching the old man was in her hand through this Apollo like dumb son. She instinctively knew that she could manipulate the fool but his father would be a difficult to handle. She also needed to know all about their business and personal holdings.
They went to the ball and she overcame the first obstacle. When Frank picked her up for the ball that evening, she was ready with the next strategic move. The young man raised by a father alone, was very awkward and uncomfortable with her. He felt inferior with most people he perceived as better educated. To him, she was no less than his high school teachers who spoke fluent European languages where he was struggling with English and the classic Portuguese. Most of the time young man hung around the common folks and primarily conversed with them in the vernacular, street languages. In front of sophisticated people, he remained tongue-tied. Frank had failed to clear seventh grade and showed no interest in his ancestral farming business.

Obviously, in her eyes Frank Mendez, a Wadi owner's barely educated son did not meet the criteria she had set for herself for conceive children only with the sperms coming from a superior gene pool. In that circumstances when she had decided to marry beneath her own status, it was essential that she did not conceive with Frank's input, but must seek a male who is of some prominence in the world to give her the high quality progeny.

Some anthropologist may attribute such thinking to her reptilian brain, which we the humans have inherited from our animal ancestors. The females in all non--human species always seek the best of the best males to mate in order to ensure better chance of survival of the species. In Marian's decision to follow that logic, one has to know her pre-marriage history.
In the turn of the 19th century, colonial holdings of all European nations in the Indian subcontinent were facing the political turmoil. The tiny colony of Portugal in Goa was undergoing social and political changes since World War I and Spanish Civil War. Relations between the native converted Catholics and their Portuguese masters were changing.

In Marian's mind, most important thing was the preservation of the prestige of her ancestry. She married Frank Mendez for two reasons, the first one being the land ownership. Mendez real estate consisted of a well-designed Spanish Stucco Mansion and a cash-crop producing farm that brought wealth. The second was the declining fortune of her own family. They did not have enough wealth left to come up with a dowry, which was expected out of a household that boasted, Bishops and Doctors. After few suitors came and left without engagement, because of lack of sums demanded, rumors about their misfortune began to float. As a pragmatic woman, she decided to lower her bar and with the help of a newly arrived young Priest, Naval De Melo from Mumbai, she got married to Frank Mendez for a paltry dowry.
Frank's father was delighted to have an educated daughter in law who showed more interest in learning the ropes of their business than in her husband who was a seventh grade dropout, and had no interest in the coconut trees or beetle nut prices.

The Miriam's working with the father in law suited Frank's lifestyle as well. His father gave up on the task of reforming him and got busy working with his new manager. Frank now had plenty of time to spend on the foreign bound vessels at the anchorage in the Marma Goa port. Long before the wedding, he had developed friendship with the seafarers and riffraff coming in and out of the bars and taverns. No one really knew what went on between the newlywed couple in the bedroom.
It did not take long for Frank to go after a 'Khalasi'(Deck hand) job after Miriam began giving him grief over his lack of ambitions, poor education and other stuff that did not meet her expectations of how a wealthy husband should live in a semi European, tradition laden society of Goa.
Soon Frank headed out to sea and his father, who had been a sick man, died happily knowing that his wonderful daughter in law had completely mastered the business and made them much more money in a year than he ever had in his lifetime.
Miriam achieved her first goal in a year-A wealthy woman with influence in the Church and the Portuguese Governor's Mansion. Not having her husband as an escort for the functions like Annual Christmas New Year Balls and the other Church activities, was not an issue at all. To fill in the gap, She had with her the handsome, Monsignor- Navel De Mello- Her family adviser for the matters related to religious and personal affairs. In fact, no one even realized Mr. Frank Mendez's absence until he showed up on a six-month long shore leave every two years.
After Frank's each two years arrival, Miriam got pregnant. Chronologically speaking, Pasqual, the first born came exactly in the month of October, the tenth month of her wedding in January of 1957 and after Frank had taken to sea right after their honeymoon in February.
Since then it became a predictable event associated with Frank's arrival in the spring of alternate years and a birth of a child in the months after his departure. Alice, followed the first born in 1957, Emanuel in 59 and Francis in 1961-The year of Goa liberation as the victorious Indians called that event.

There was no reason for anyone in Goa to wonder who was fathering the children. Other than birt of a child, Franks' voyages and visits to homeland had very little impact on the inhabitants of Mendez Mansion. Frank simply was an intermezzo in their pursuit of happiness which all family members waited to end as soon as began upon his arrival. The secret of children's progeny remained a secret until Miriam revealed it to Dr. Pasqual on her death bed.
The truth hidden from all other members of the Mendez family of Goa now became a secret of Dr. Pascal Mendez. It's impact on the future of his own and that of his siblings' lives, was extremely difficult to predict and to add to that, unexpected return of their long lost father and two step brothers in their tranquil life, had added a new dimension. The 'To-be, or Not-to-be,' dilemma was not just a Shakespearean cliche for the Doctor Pascal; it had emerged from a nightmare as real-life, emotional and moral storm.

"Should I reveal it to Frank and my siblings, or let the truth remain buried in my heart forever? Let me discuss it with my trusted friend and wife." Pascal concluded and headed towards his bedroom