Biographical Fiction posted November 12, 2017


Exceptional
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a personal story

To the nursing home.

by Dutchie


It all started in September. Hubby became ill and got a bladder infection. Our doctor had holidays, so we got a substitute doctor who sent him to the hospital.. I brought Henk to the hospital with my neighbor and there they told us he had to stay for a couple of days.

Dementia and a bladder infection can lead to a delirium. Henk was very confused and he saw things that were not there. In the middle of the night he was wandering through the hallways of the hospital.They could not handle it and decided to send him home after four days. "At homehome he will heal faster,"they said.
"What make you think I can handle it if you don't know what to do?" I asked, but I got no answer.

I never had an experience with a delirium, so I took an anxious hubby with me home.
He had no idea where he lived and no realization of time.
He did not recognize his own house when we arrived.

"Do I live here and do you live here too?" he asked.
"Yes Henk, we live here both together for eight years."
"We live in Amsterdam, don't we?"
"No dear, it's twenty-seven years ago and then we moved to Zoetermeer."

When he came home everything was strange to him and he was exhausted and wanted to go to bed. After an hour the substitute doctor came along. "It's not right they sent him home so soon," he said. "What are your limits?" "I'm afraid I have no limits, I do what I have to do and I'm there for him when he needs me", I said.

"Henk wants no help from Home Care, he says there's nothing wrong with him. I let Home Care come for his medication so they can keep an eye on me. I really don't know what my limit is and I'm glad I have some control."

"You can't go on like this," the doctor said. "You are running a nursing home of your own.
Something has to happen very fast. You do it so many years now. I'll talk to your doctor, Home Care and specialists."

On the twenty-fourth of October I had to bring my love to a nursing home.
Henk did not want to go to a nursing home, he wanted to stay with me and I was forced to bring him there.

My doctor, Home Care and specialists had a plan: I had to say I had to be admitted to the hospital. In fact it was a nursing home. He had to go with me to support me.
When we arrived we were separated and they send me home.

I'm still sick of it and I visit him twice a week because the distance is too far. Every time I visit him he begs me to take him home again.

I wonder why doctors could ask this from me, it makes me angry and sad....


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