THE WIZARD WHO LOST HIS WORDS
by
Katharine Folkes

Zard was a freckle-faced, red-headed word-wizard. He looked so innocent that people smiled at him until he opened his mouth and put spells on them. Why did he put spells on them, you might ask? Because he enjoyed showing off his very large vocabulary. His red head was jam-packed with all kinds of wonderful words.

But time passed, as it always does, and Zard got old. His shiny red hair turned musty gray and his freckles ran together on his wrinkled cheeks - which made him look rather odd, to tell you the truth - but even worse than that, he began to forget. And though he always remembered to feed his cat, Snake Oil, he began to forget the things he valued most: his words.

One day Zard was showing his new wizard hat to Grosella the witch. "Isn't this the handsomest...the handsomest...?" He couldn't think of hat to save his life. "You made me forget!" he yelled at Grosella and stormed off, shoving the "whatever it was" back on his head. Something was very wrong!

That night Zard couldn't sleep. His brain cells banged around like bumper cars at the fair, until... he got a wicked idea! He could steal words! He could steal from people whose brains were young and full of imagination. People who didn't forget. Kids' brains! By jingo, what a fire cracker idea! And like that, he was asleep.

Next morning, walking to school, Zard passed Winton Winston's window and heard him practicing a ... fib! Zard peeked in. Winton said to his mirror, "I can't go to school today, Mom. I have fever and a contagious cold."

Hmmm, thought Zard--'Fever and contagious cold'--useful words. WHOOSH! He
sucked Winton's words right into his almost empty memory bank.

At school, in Ms. Angst's Language Arts class Zard perched, invisible, on the windowsill. It was Poetry Week and the students were reciting poems they'd written.

Willie Arnot read:
"I wonder just how many ways there are to say hello?
There's greetings! hi! and how ya been? And wazzup, man? and Yo!
There's funny grips and handshakes, and how ya doin', Ace?
But best is when my dog jumps up and licks me in the face."

Zounds! thought Zard. Yo? Wazzup? Wondrous new words!

Next, Tony Spamoni read:
"I had a snake. His name was Hank. He stretched and crawled out of his tank.
My mama said, "For goodness sake, would you please pick up that snake?
'Hank won't hurt you, Mom,' I said. 'He's scared to death of you, instead.'
'If that is true,' she whispered low, 'why is he chompin' on my toe?'"

Zard chuckled. A toe-chomping snake! Another fire cracker idea! He moved invisibly from class to class sucking students' words into his brain. As his memory bank filled, theirs emptied.

Watching outside a classroom, he heard a girl named Callie Donia heave a sigh of boredom and recite:

"I lost my bubblegum last night when I was sound asleep.
I found it, later, in my hair, down in there pretty deep.
I need to get it out so I can add it to the rest,
And blow the biggest bubble in the bubblegum contest."

Yu-u-ck! thought Zard, sucking in her words, but not a bad idea. I could zap bubblegum
into somebody's hair. Messy! Wonderful!

Later, Zard saw the janitor with his toolkit. The old fellow was scratching his head. Zard couldn't resist. He pointed his wand at him. "Look out hair, here I come--a sticky wad of bubblegum." The janitor jerked his fingers from his hair, trailing long pink strings of gum. Zard laughed all the way home.

That afternoon, Zard and Snake Oil were walking in the woods when they heard someone
whimpering. Tony Spamoni was on the ground, his foot caught in a vine. Tony pointed, in terror.

"What is it?" asked Zard, squinting.

"It's, it's a...

Suddenly Snake Oil hissed and jumped straight up in the air. A snake crawled over
Tony's shoe! Zard quickly pointed his wand at the creature and POOF, it disappeared.
Walking home, he thought of the boy's lost words. Tony couldn't say "snake." That was dangerous!

On Saturday, Zard and Snake Oil heard, "No, please! It's only...." It was Callie Donia.
Her mother pulled her towards their car.

Zard grinned as he watched "bubble gum girl" getting in trouble.

"You have worms in your hair!" shrieked her mother. "The doctor will probably shave
your head."

Callie cried, "No! It's not worms, it's...."

Zard's gleeful grin faded. Maybe he'd gone too far. What had these kids ever done to
him? Nothing.

Later, Zard saw Willie Arnot shooting baskets in his driveway.

"Hi," said Willie.

Zard stopped. He wanted--no, he needed to talk to someone.

Willie smiled. "Can I help you?"

"Yo! Maybe you can," Zard said. "I've been forgetting my words, and ..."

"Me, too," Willie said. "Lots of times I can't say what I mean. It's awful!"

Zard sighed. "Well, son, I'm afraid I'm to blame." He introduced himself and confessed his dirty deed. "I was losing my words, and you smart kids have so many, I took some of yours. Terrible of me. I'm sorry and I'm going to fix it right now." He closed his eyes. "Magic rays return today the stolen words I took away."

Zard's brain emptied his wonderful new words. "There. Back where they belong. I'll never steal them again."

Willie smiled. "I can feel them!" Then he looked hard at the wizard. "But what if you forget your promise?"

Zard patted his cat. "Snake Oil will remind me. He loves kids. No more spells on boys and girls."

Willie's eyes lit up. You mean you'll still put spells on grown-ups?"

Zard looked surprised. "Well, of course! If I can remember them."

Willie grinned. "Easy. Us kids will help you. Just tap into our brains and borrow the words you need, then return them."

Zard clapped his hands. "Word-lending-libraries! In kids' brains! What a fire cracker idea. Thanks, Willie. You're... like awesome!"

Walking away, Zard laughed. He'd kept those two words so kids would think of new ones. Because of this, some kids couldn't talk at all, but the smart ones...well, Zard couldn't wait to see what they came up with!