The wonder of FanStory began July 2015 for me. It began with the feeling it was God gifted at that time for the fulfilling of my destiny in this life. The timing still seems so appropriate for my autumn to wintering years. Years of reflection on the whole vastness of life, Earth, Universe, and humanity: all in the contexts of my life experience, and its unfolding daily intimacies that focus my meanings, vision and sense of purpose. And, having walked the, still less travelled, roads on the Way of Christ for many years, FanStory quickly became a miracle unfolding for me. Indeed, the miracle unfolding me! Me sharing! Me being human, inspired, nourished, and feeling known and reinforced by others as I unfurled daily! Quite magical!

And, initially I was so happy to share mainly poetical gifts of my journey through the nineteen nineties. Not creations, not artistic endeavours, but gifts: mostly inspirations of God's Words strengthening me with courage; and the higher meanings of the growth focusing challenges on my Way with Christ. Meanings that made little sense to my family; or the world I was ejected from to walk in the Wilderness with Christ. Worlds of which Jesus is given to have said: `you may walk in many worlds, but never two at the same time!' Yet, also a different world to that I grew up in, and largely am challenged, or stirred to a higher consciousness by, even today: a world cultivated on the principle: `little girls, and individualized bigger ones, should be seen, but never heard.'

So, FanStory has been an exhilarating ride. It has also been a deeply, holistically integrating one: fine-tuning my sense of self and why I am.

And, there come the challenges from several unsuspected, sudden landings into what I conceptualize as a black hole, unseen on the road. There, I can still receive the light of Fanstory stars; but no help or enlightenment to return to my FanStory path. I post into one book. It comes up in another! `Help! What do I do?'
`Can't understand you!'
I am disabled!
I am alone! Feeling ridiculed for stepping into an unacknowledged vacuum, or void not experience by another.
And, yes! On the final occasion that led to my wintering at the crossroad to my second spring, my work, my previewed work sitting in the wrong book was just disabled! Disabled while I cried! Help! No help! No explanation! No understanding on Earth!

I might have been dead! And, I had just taken out the Premier Shield!

Suddenly, I felt, I'm just a pawn to another heartless bureaucracy!

Now, that might be the sacrifice gifting my growth, purpose and destiny in this `normal' world. For I'm a co-creator! Not just a visionary of change, and God's promised Golden Harvest!

I believe, as fully mature and responsive humanity, we enhance all on Earth with love as we unfold our unique potential and destinies co-creatively with God and the Universe each day. Two thousand years after Jesus anchored seeds of `Our Father', giving us simple stories and parables, we can create miracles or terror conceived of no virgin or family love. And, our Mother Earth needs our maturity as fully response-able individuals (inner divine dualities, human and spiritual souls) in using God's gift of choice, and sacred life-creating Words and Power for (GOOD - or - NO GOOD, LOVE or EGO, LIVE or EVIL) responsibly. That is the gift of our humanity rising from our Old Testament of Mankind, ADD-I-AM and I EVOLVE -- survival of the fittest -- what! We can under-stand our Earth Tree of Knowledge and Life today. We embody all known consciousness and life from our Genesis -- whenever, we can best conceive that began for that small percentage of us that is neither Ape nor pre-human!

My FanStory journey began with faith, love, excitement, individual hopes, and trust in the meaning and enlightenment empowering each day. How quickly and wonderfully all these precious attributes were reinforced with the glory of sharing myself, growing to know myself as never before! And, such wonders gave new energy, courage and meaning to the rocky road that I've long accepted is preparing me, for the next step, meaning and highest potential of what is my chosen destiny -- important to our Earth and human being here at this long envisioned crucible of time!

And for me, FanStory must continue as the key to fabulous co-creative humanity empowering me on my Way of destiny. Therefore, after such solitude at the crossroads, and such a wonderful and empowering welcome back, envisioning my second year I am stirred to ask: `is Christ leading my Way? Or ego?'

Oh! Yes, I have loved the helter-skelter exhilaration of the ride! My first and second year will always remain precious in my memory, and in the flowering on of me!

But, what about my purpose?

Do I just want to be sharing the same thrills, thoughts, or re-creations for the next decade or more?

And, if I that is my wish, will the world or FanStory remain as exuberant as the summer peak of yesteryear, and gift the same nourishment?

And, will the black holes continue to engulf me in disconcerting, isolating realities -- if I cannot receive the enlightenment I need now? Or even be understood if I ask for help or support?

Yet, for now, the gift is to write, not necessarily creatively; but as the expression of me being human unfurling my heart and soul so privileged, and happy, to know how blest I am by FanStory today; because, at least, two people will read what I write, and two will gift their personal humanity, inspiring and nourishing me anew. I thank you all, Maureen*&*