My Bloody Life!

 

Bloody hell, please pull some strings,

remove me from this awful thing;

this cavern's yellow waters gush,

a murky golden, tinted blush.

 

I was so clean just hours ago;

so white, pristine, still, even so,

now coated in gelatinous goo —

how would you feel if it were you?

Without me, she just cannot cope,

more valuable to her than SCOPE.

Yet, from her pretty porcelain throne,

she'll toss me to a fate unknown.

 

She worries constantly over me —

she keeps me close (I'm so Carefree!)

Her secret's Always safe, —she'll see;

there's none into her more than me.

 

Her mood is touchy while I'm here,

her husband rarely calls her dear,

in fact, he's nowhere to be found,

when I'm attached and lacy-bound.

 

My life's a crimson, faded blush,

I'm destined to be tossed and flushed;

my life brought on by misery,

a monthly, bloody tragedy!

 

Her mutt gnaws me like a long-lost bone,

she rescues me with 'e-w-w-w-s' and moans,

still, I'm as silent as can be,

while basking in fluidity.

 

So, golly, won't you help me, please?

My life is simply misery!

As I reside here in the gash,

just bloody wasted, useless trash...