Raising Kids in a Racially Diverse World

Part I: The Pre-School Years

 
The recent murder of Trayvon Martin in Sanford, Florida not only brought attention to the vulnerability of African-American males in America, it also made many realize racism is no longer just a “white versus black” issue. George Zimmerman, a member of his community’s neighborhood watch group, who has been charged with the murder of Trayvon, is considered to be a multi-racial Hispanic.

The U.S. Census’s latest American Community Survey shows that almost 40 million people, or about one eighth of the current U.S. population, have moved here from another country, including Mexico, India, China, the Philippines, and El Salvador.¹ Whether immigrants are here legally or illegally, the United States continues to be viewed both as the land of opportunity as well as a cultural melting pot.

Even the public schools in a relatively small city like Suffolk, Virginia, have seen an influx of other ethnicities, particularly over the past fifteen years. For most of my educational career, the ethnic breakdown of students in Suffolk Public Schools was x % Caucasian, y % African-American, and less than 1% other (all other ethnic groups). Today the percentage of other ethnicities ranges from 4 – 7%.

What, then, is a parent to do to raise their children not only to be tolerant of other cultures but to also have empathy and respect for others? Contrary to what seems to be the popular opinion, it is NOT the school system’s responsibility to do this for parents. Rather, school employees should always model the tolerance, empathy, and respect which is desired from their students.

First and foremost, parents MUST take an honest assessment of themselves as to what their children are hearing them say or how they are seeing them react in terms of people who are different from them. As a parent, do you make disparaging remarks about particular groups, such as: “I would never get on a plane with a Muslim because he/she might be planning to blow it up.” Or “Those darn Mexicans have moved here and are taking up all the jobs. No wonder my brother can’t find a job.”? Do you pull your children a little closer to you when a large number of another ethnic group is walking towards you in a mall? Do you have any friends from other ethnic groups? In most cases, the roots of racism begin at home. Simply put, children learn what they live!

Between the ages of 2 – 5, children begin noticing, and questioning, the differences between people. These questions are natural and should be answered both thoughtfully and positively. These questions include issues of color, disabilities, cultural dress, physical differences, and language.

In the publication, Beyond the Golden Rule: A Parent’s Guide to Preventing and Responding to Prejudices, author Dana Williams provides five tips parents can use during the preschool years. These should also be used by caregivers and pre-school teachers, as well. These tips are:

Be honest. Don’t encourage children not to “see” color or tell children we are all the same. Rather, discuss differences openly and highlight diversity by choosing picture books, toys, games and videos that feature diverse characters in positive, non-stereotypical roles.

Embrace curiosity. Be careful not to ignore or discourage your youngster’s questions about differences among people, even if the questions make you uncomfortable. Not being open to such questions sends the message that difference is negative.
 
Broader choices. Be careful not to promote stereotypical gender roles, suggesting there are certain games, sports or activities that only girls can do or only boys can do.
 
Foster pride. Talk to your child about your family heritage to encourage self-knowledge and a positive self-concept.
 
Lead by example. Widen your circle of friends and acquaintances to include people from different backgrounds, cultures and experiences.²

This series will continue with Raising Kids in a Racially Diverse World: Part II: Elementary and Pre-Teen Years 

¹(Cettina, 2012), p 58
 
²(Williams),p 19
 
 
Bibliography
 
Cettina, T. (2012, May). "Culture Blend". (S. Bean, & S. Wood, Eds.) Parenting(263), pp. 56-64. Retrieved May 4, 2012

Williams, D. (n.d.). Beyond the Golden Rule: A Parent's Guide to Preventing and Responding to Prejudice. 56. (B. Willoughby, Ed.) Montgomery, Alabama, USA: Teaching Tolerance. Retrieved May 4, 2012, from www.tolerance.org/sites/default/files/general/beyond_golden_rule.pdf