Background: Two robbers with a briefcase full of money wait
for their partner in a condemned house, inhabited by six female
misfits. Three renters help themselves to money when  briefcase
is left unguarded. A car accident kills the getaway man. Mickey
opens the case to find the money  gone, accuses Mack of a
double cross. The women confess that they stole the money.
Ellen gives up her bills  Mickey admits to his partner he was
wrong to accuse him.  
 
MICKEY
Yeah, yeah.  Neither one of us took it.  

MACK
Friends again?

MICKEY
Yeah, yeah, yeah.  Put the money back in the case.

MACK  
I’m glad we’re friends again.  You’re the only one I got, Mick.

KANDY
You have me, Mack.  

MICKEY
He’s my friend, you floozy. Get your hands off of him.    

ELLEN
Slap her.  That’s what they do in my soaps.
                       
MICKEY (aiming gun at her)                
I’ll slap you. This ain’t even half of what was in that case. 
Who else got our money?

KANDY
I don’t. Search me.
            
                            (She assumes search position.)

MICKEY  (to MACK)
Search her.

MACK
Really?

FRIEDA   
Don’t lay a hand on Miss Kane. I’ll tell you the truth.  All of us took
money— except Sarge. She knew nothing about it.                    

LOONY
We need that money more than you bad guys. I have to go back into therapy.
            
                          (She jams a thumb into her mouth.)

ELLEN
And I need four operations so I can breathe through nose again.

                         (She wheezes loudly.)

FRIEDA
I need dental work and new glasses.

KANDY
I need seven veils.

SARGE      
I need to fix up this house!  

MACK
Gee, Mickey, maybe we ought to let ’em keep it.

MICKEY
Shut up, pea brain.  Grab the case and start collectin’.

MACK
Mickey, I don’t like it when you call me that name and tell me to shut up.

KANDY
I would never talk to you like that, Mack.
                                    
MICKEY (sarcastic)
You’re right, Mack. I was bein’ rude. I meant to say “Mr. Pea Brain” and
“Please shut up.”  Now will you collect the damn money!     

                         (Grinning at his victory, MACK holds case open, crosses
                         to CRYSTAL.)

CRYSTAL
I gave it to my spirit guide. He hold it ‘til I get to other side.    
    
                        (MACK crosses to KANDY.)
            
KANDY
I don’t remember where I put it.  We can search my bedroom—together.

LOONY
I stuffed my share in the garbage can.

MICKEY
What!

                         (Sound of garbage truck O.S.)

FRIEDA  (deadpan)
Oh darn. This is collection day.
              
MICKEY
Mack, get out and check the garbage!

                        (MACK heads toward door, briefcase in hand.)

LOONY
Wait a minute. I think I put it the basement.

SARGE
The basement?  When did you—
                    
LOONY
Yep, it’s definitely in the basement. I put it behind the washing machine.

                         (MACK heads for the basement.)
            
SARGE
You can’t go down there!   I mean – the rats  are vicious. . And- and there's
paint  on the wall--with lead.        
                                    
MICKEY
Only thing down there is a washer and an old freezer with a padlock—.
        
SARGE  
Don’t touch that freezer!                    
                
MICKEY
Another order?    “Don’t touch the freezer”?   ( a beat)  Say, a light is comin’
on in my head. I’m thinkin’ maybe you got hidden loot in the basement. 
Maybe in the freezer.   Go on Mack. Get down and take off that padlock.
                    
MACK
The door’s locked. And the key’s gone.                
 
SARGE
I have the key. And I’ll make sure you don’t get it.

                         (She takes it from a pocket, starts to put in her mouth.)
                      
FRIEDA
Are you crazy?  You’ll choke to death.

                         (She snatches key, crosses to door,unlocks it.)

SARGE  (pleading)
Please don't  open the freezer.

                       (She starts to cry. The women rush to comfort her.)
             
MICKEY
Okay, Boots. Tell me why not!   

SARGE
Because—because the Colonel’s body is in there.

                      (The women back away.)
 
MICKEY (backs away too.)
You murdered your husband?

To be conitnued.