| Commentary and Philosophy Non-Fiction posted August 8, 2010 |
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Sometimes size does matter.
Butts Not Buts
by Sasha
Today's ramble is short, sweet, and to the point. So put down your can of beer, cup of coffee, or glass of wine and pay attention. This is important.
There are no ands, ifs, or buts about it, North Americans (Europeans are a ahead of us in this department) have a serious problem with the female Mexican butt. Yes, we are talking about the tush, bottom, backside, derriere, and too often rudely referred to female ass. Yup, I have reached my limit and feel it is time for me to set the record straight on this serious subject.
Go ahead, laugh but keep in mind the day WILL come when your tush (just like mine) will no longer capture the lingering eye of a handsome young man causing his hormones (better known as testosterone) to surge with passion. Just wait. The day will arrive (redundant, yes, but necessary) when that part of your anatomy you so proudly flaunt with shameless arrogant pride, will become a mushy blob of not so attractive flesh hanging like ninety-year-old worn out bowling balls flapping against the back of your knees. Take my word for it, Mother Time is just around the corner waiting to pounce on you like an angry tax collector with a serious attitude problem (okay, I know all tax collectors have lousy attitudes, it's the number two requirement of the job; I'll let you figure out what number one is).
First of all, I believe it is time for us (that means everyone living North of the US Mexican Border) to stand up and apologize to Jennifer Lopez, Salma Hayek, Eva Longoria, and don't forget Adriana Fonesca, who, for years have put up with rude snickering and pompous ridicule over their well rounded, nicely pronounced, and superbly proportioned derrieres. I am talking to all of you who have stood in line at the grocery store pretending not to look at the front page of the Star or National Inquirer, yeah, the one with the paparazzo's photograph of Jennifer and Salma bending over to tie their shoes. Don't even try to deny it. I am not buying it.
This is where I pause and provide my usual fascinating and important information about today's topic. It is my intent to show all of you the error of your ways.
When I first joined the Breakfast Club, I often found the guys abruptly (did I mention this occurs quite often?) stopping in mid sentence. It didn't take long for me to see their eyes glued on a beautiful Mexican woman walking by the table. Looking like puppets connected to a string, they slowly follow the woman with their mouths open as though they want to say something profound but words fail them. Only when the woman is beyond sight does the conversation continue as though there had been no interruption.
The Tramoya Restaurant is less than a block from the Angela Peralta School of Fine Art and provides an endless supply of young, beautiful women for Armando, Juanito, Joel, Carlos, Pee Wee and Larry to admire. I found this quite amusing and for a while teased them about being old men lost in dreams of their past. One day Juanito smiled and said, "There is nothing more powerful than a beautiful woman. It is her beauty that creates the balance against our foolish machismo."
I can only speak for Mazatlan when I say with absolute authority that women here are treated with great respect. Brothers protect their sisters and fathers adore their daughters. A beautiful woman is openly admired but I have yet to hear a rude remark, catcall, or the familiar shrill whistle from a construction worker. Such behavior is simply not tolerated. That said, let's get back to the female Mexican butt.
Sorry for the overused cliché, but I must add, "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder." We all know everyone has their own personal opinion of what they view as beautiful. However, here in Mazatlan there is one universal truth; there is nothing more appealing than a large, well-rounded, firm derriere perched on a pair of equally firm thighs. Unlike the United States, breasts are an important feature but definitely not number one on their list of importance. What I find most interesting is that as Mexican woman age, their butts remain pretty much the same as when they were twenty. Unlike the middle-aged American and Canadian women whose butts are sagging like sacks of wet sand while the backside of a fifty-year-old Mexican woman could hold up the Brooklyn Bridge during an earthquake. Take my word for it. And the men love it!
I spend a lot of time at the beach and get a big kick out of some of the tourists parading (and they do parade) their Barbie Doll bodies covered in skimpy bikinis thinking that all eyes are on them. I also see them snickering at the large derrière of a Mexican woman oblivious to the fact that the eyes of every male on the beach is focused on, yup, you guessed it, the one with the big butt.
There is no real point to this ramble other than to let you know that North Americans seem to have missed the boat on this one. I think it is about time we (both men and women) stand up, bow our heads in shame, and apologize to Jennifer, Salma and all the other women with well-rounded backsides. For goodness sake, take a look at the photograph of Salma and tell me she doesn't have a great tush. I dare you!
Today's ramble is short, sweet, and to the point. So put down your can of beer, cup of coffee, or glass of wine and pay attention. This is important.
There are no ands, ifs, or buts about it, North Americans (Europeans are a ahead of us in this department) have a serious problem with the female Mexican butt. Yes, we are talking about the tush, bottom, backside, derriere, and too often rudely referred to female ass. Yup, I have reached my limit and feel it is time for me to set the record straight on this serious subject.
Go ahead, laugh but keep in mind the day WILL come when your tush (just like mine) will no longer capture the lingering eye of a handsome young man causing his hormones (better known as testosterone) to surge with passion. Just wait. The day will arrive (redundant, yes, but necessary) when that part of your anatomy you so proudly flaunt with shameless arrogant pride, will become a mushy blob of not so attractive flesh hanging like ninety-year-old worn out bowling balls flapping against the back of your knees. Take my word for it, Mother Time is just around the corner waiting to pounce on you like an angry tax collector with a serious attitude problem (okay, I know all tax collectors have lousy attitudes, it's the number two requirement of the job; I'll let you figure out what number one is).
First of all, I believe it is time for us (that means everyone living North of the US Mexican Border) to stand up and apologize to Jennifer Lopez, Salma Hayek, Eva Longoria, and don't forget Adriana Fonesca, who, for years have put up with rude snickering and pompous ridicule over their well rounded, nicely pronounced, and superbly proportioned derrieres. I am talking to all of you who have stood in line at the grocery store pretending not to look at the front page of the Star or National Inquirer, yeah, the one with the paparazzo's photograph of Jennifer and Salma bending over to tie their shoes. Don't even try to deny it. I am not buying it.
This is where I pause and provide my usual fascinating and important information about today's topic. It is my intent to show all of you the error of your ways.
When I first joined the Breakfast Club, I often found the guys abruptly (did I mention this occurs quite often?) stopping in mid sentence. It didn't take long for me to see their eyes glued on a beautiful Mexican woman walking by the table. Looking like puppets connected to a string, they slowly follow the woman with their mouths open as though they want to say something profound but words fail them. Only when the woman is beyond sight does the conversation continue as though there had been no interruption.
The Tramoya Restaurant is less than a block from the Angela Peralta School of Fine Art and provides an endless supply of young, beautiful women for Armando, Juanito, Joel, Carlos, Pee Wee and Larry to admire. I found this quite amusing and for a while teased them about being old men lost in dreams of their past. One day Juanito smiled and said, "There is nothing more powerful than a beautiful woman. It is her beauty that creates the balance against our foolish machismo."
I can only speak for Mazatlan when I say with absolute authority that women here are treated with great respect. Brothers protect their sisters and fathers adore their daughters. A beautiful woman is openly admired but I have yet to hear a rude remark, catcall, or the familiar shrill whistle from a construction worker. Such behavior is simply not tolerated. That said, let's get back to the female Mexican butt.
Sorry for the overused cliché, but I must add, "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder." We all know everyone has their own personal opinion of what they view as beautiful. However, here in Mazatlan there is one universal truth; there is nothing more appealing than a large, well-rounded, firm derriere perched on a pair of equally firm thighs. Unlike the United States, breasts are an important feature but definitely not number one on their list of importance. What I find most interesting is that as Mexican woman age, their butts remain pretty much the same as when they were twenty. Unlike the middle-aged American and Canadian women whose butts are sagging like sacks of wet sand while the backside of a fifty-year-old Mexican woman could hold up the Brooklyn Bridge during an earthquake. Take my word for it. And the men love it!
I spend a lot of time at the beach and get a big kick out of some of the tourists parading (and they do parade) their Barbie Doll bodies covered in skimpy bikinis thinking that all eyes are on them. I also see them snickering at the large derrière of a Mexican woman oblivious to the fact that the eyes of every male on the beach is focused on, yup, you guessed it, the one with the big butt.
There is no real point to this ramble other than to let you know that North Americans seem to have missed the boat on this one. I think it is about time we (both men and women) stand up, bow our heads in shame, and apologize to Jennifer, Salma and all the other women with well-rounded backsides. For goodness sake, take a look at the photograph of Salma and tell me she doesn't have a great tush. I dare you!
There are no ands, ifs, or buts about it, North Americans (Europeans are a ahead of us in this department) have a serious problem with the female Mexican butt. Yes, we are talking about the tush, bottom, backside, derriere, and too often rudely referred to female ass. Yup, I have reached my limit and feel it is time for me to set the record straight on this serious subject.
Go ahead, laugh but keep in mind the day WILL come when your tush (just like mine) will no longer capture the lingering eye of a handsome young man causing his hormones (better known as testosterone) to surge with passion. Just wait. The day will arrive (redundant, yes, but necessary) when that part of your anatomy you so proudly flaunt with shameless arrogant pride, will become a mushy blob of not so attractive flesh hanging like ninety-year-old worn out bowling balls flapping against the back of your knees. Take my word for it, Mother Time is just around the corner waiting to pounce on you like an angry tax collector with a serious attitude problem (okay, I know all tax collectors have lousy attitudes, it's the number two requirement of the job; I'll let you figure out what number one is).
First of all, I believe it is time for us (that means everyone living North of the US Mexican Border) to stand up and apologize to Jennifer Lopez, Salma Hayek, Eva Longoria, and don't forget Adriana Fonesca, who, for years have put up with rude snickering and pompous ridicule over their well rounded, nicely pronounced, and superbly proportioned derrieres. I am talking to all of you who have stood in line at the grocery store pretending not to look at the front page of the Star or National Inquirer, yeah, the one with the paparazzo's photograph of Jennifer and Salma bending over to tie their shoes. Don't even try to deny it. I am not buying it.
This is where I pause and provide my usual fascinating and important information about today's topic. It is my intent to show all of you the error of your ways.
When I first joined the Breakfast Club, I often found the guys abruptly (did I mention this occurs quite often?) stopping in mid sentence. It didn't take long for me to see their eyes glued on a beautiful Mexican woman walking by the table. Looking like puppets connected to a string, they slowly follow the woman with their mouths open as though they want to say something profound but words fail them. Only when the woman is beyond sight does the conversation continue as though there had been no interruption.
The Tramoya Restaurant is less than a block from the Angela Peralta School of Fine Art and provides an endless supply of young, beautiful women for Armando, Juanito, Joel, Carlos, Pee Wee and Larry to admire. I found this quite amusing and for a while teased them about being old men lost in dreams of their past. One day Juanito smiled and said, "There is nothing more powerful than a beautiful woman. It is her beauty that creates the balance against our foolish machismo."
I can only speak for Mazatlan when I say with absolute authority that women here are treated with great respect. Brothers protect their sisters and fathers adore their daughters. A beautiful woman is openly admired but I have yet to hear a rude remark, catcall, or the familiar shrill whistle from a construction worker. Such behavior is simply not tolerated. That said, let's get back to the female Mexican butt.
Sorry for the overused cliché, but I must add, "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder." We all know everyone has their own personal opinion of what they view as beautiful. However, here in Mazatlan there is one universal truth; there is nothing more appealing than a large, well-rounded, firm derriere perched on a pair of equally firm thighs. Unlike the United States, breasts are an important feature but definitely not number one on their list of importance. What I find most interesting is that as Mexican woman age, their butts remain pretty much the same as when they were twenty. Unlike the middle-aged American and Canadian women whose butts are sagging like sacks of wet sand while the backside of a fifty-year-old Mexican woman could hold up the Brooklyn Bridge during an earthquake. Take my word for it. And the men love it!
I spend a lot of time at the beach and get a big kick out of some of the tourists parading (and they do parade) their Barbie Doll bodies covered in skimpy bikinis thinking that all eyes are on them. I also see them snickering at the large derrière of a Mexican woman oblivious to the fact that the eyes of every male on the beach is focused on, yup, you guessed it, the one with the big butt.
There is no real point to this ramble other than to let you know that North Americans seem to have missed the boat on this one. I think it is about time we (both men and women) stand up, bow our heads in shame, and apologize to Jennifer, Salma and all the other women with well-rounded backsides. For goodness sake, take a look at the photograph of Salma and tell me she doesn't have a great tush. I dare you!
 Recognized |
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Sorry, I am still here. My bus doesn't leave until Tuesday so you just have to put up with me until then. Can you tell I need a vacation????
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