| Humor Non-Fiction posted May 16, 2024 |
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I do not take life for granted and I live it!
On The Reaching of a Milestone
by Reese Turner
On The Reaching of a Milestone Contest Winner
There are people who strive and suffer to be “Above Average”. There are others who seem to work hard at not coming close. My read is that many of us live somewhere in the middle. I am guilty as charged.
Yet, last month I celebrated reaching the level of “average on life itself”. I’ve been working at it for a few years. Well, not working too hard, but talking and thinking and saying “enough” now and then - when I am indulging in something I like too much. That counts as “work” in my book.
So, what makes this average level so noteworthy, so important, so cherished that I would write about it here? On April 26, I reached 76 years old. 76! Why is that special? 76 years is the current average lifespan of a white, American male in the USA. At last, I am officially average! It cannot be denied!
By next April, at age 77, I will officially be “Above Average”.
• My mother would say, “That’s my boy! I knew you could do it!”
• My father would say, “I’m not so sure!”
• My wife, “Seriously? Well, I’m going shopping.”
• My daughters, “Nice. Can you keep the kids this weekend?”
• My former boss, “You were alive when you worked for me? Who knew?”
• My accountant, “Whatever, but you are now running out of money…”
• My preacher, “Reaching any milestone calls for a celebratory offering!”
• My golf buddies, “You get worse every year!”
• My dog, “Really? Just feed me, throw me some balls and scratch my ears!”
• The cat, (No comment. Just turned her back to me.)
Full disclosure: I was a teen-ager and a college student in the 60’s. From what I remember, I enjoyed myself in the 60’s so much. By some accounts, too much! By ’69, I had flunked out of college, working part-time construction and was in-line for the draft. I joined the Navy and survived boot-camp and beyond. Cigarettes were really cheap at the Base Exchange, and booze at the Enlisted Club was cheap for all I wanted. I developed new bad habits which stayed with me for years thereafter.
So, my first heart attack came at age 48. My second, around 55. I was always a slow learner, but I finally cleaned it up (somewhat), stayed alive to marry off three daughters and welcome six grand-kids. All covered under “Blessings, Undeserved” and/or “Blind Luck”. But, now, at 76, I live at the threshold of “Above Average”. Had I known I would live this long, I would have taken better care of myself. Maybe…
Average is now, indeed, a milestone reached in my life! Will I seek more? Piling up milestones reached might seem greedy and a bit braggadocious. I think I shall be happy with all I have. Thanks for reading my tale. May your future reach milestones as well…
There are people who strive and suffer to be “Above Average”. There are others who seem to work hard at not coming close. My read is that many of us live somewhere in the middle. I am guilty as charged.
Yet, last month I celebrated reaching the level of “average on life itself”. I’ve been working at it for a few years. Well, not working too hard, but talking and thinking and saying “enough” now and then - when I am indulging in something I like too much. That counts as “work” in my book.
So, what makes this average level so noteworthy, so important, so cherished that I would write about it here? On April 26, I reached 76 years old. 76! Why is that special? 76 years is the current average lifespan of a white, American male in the USA. At last, I am officially average! It cannot be denied!
By next April, at age 77, I will officially be “Above Average”.
• My mother would say, “That’s my boy! I knew you could do it!”
• My father would say, “I’m not so sure!”
• My wife, “Seriously? Well, I’m going shopping.”
• My daughters, “Nice. Can you keep the kids this weekend?”
• My former boss, “You were alive when you worked for me? Who knew?”
• My accountant, “Whatever, but you are now running out of money…”
• My preacher, “Reaching any milestone calls for a celebratory offering!”
• My golf buddies, “You get worse every year!”
• My dog, “Really? Just feed me, throw me some balls and scratch my ears!”
• The cat, (No comment. Just turned her back to me.)
Full disclosure: I was a teen-ager and a college student in the 60’s. From what I remember, I enjoyed myself in the 60’s so much. By some accounts, too much! By ’69, I had flunked out of college, working part-time construction and was in-line for the draft. I joined the Navy and survived boot-camp and beyond. Cigarettes were really cheap at the Base Exchange, and booze at the Enlisted Club was cheap for all I wanted. I developed new bad habits which stayed with me for years thereafter.
So, my first heart attack came at age 48. My second, around 55. I was always a slow learner, but I finally cleaned it up (somewhat), stayed alive to marry off three daughters and welcome six grand-kids. All covered under “Blessings, Undeserved” and/or “Blind Luck”. But, now, at 76, I live at the threshold of “Above Average”. Had I known I would live this long, I would have taken better care of myself. Maybe…
Average is now, indeed, a milestone reached in my life! Will I seek more? Piling up milestones reached might seem greedy and a bit braggadocious. I think I shall be happy with all I have. Thanks for reading my tale. May your future reach milestones as well…
On The Reaching of a Milestone Contest Winner |
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